"Ooooh....nice try! It's ok though! You're not going home today empty handed! Tell him what he's won Johnny!"
"Well beatoffcrapmaro, it's your lucky day! You've won a lifetime personal assistant! This assistant will make you feel like a star as they clean your trailer, knock the rust off your car, and cook your Spam and eggs! They can babysit your kids, or the kids of any white trash tramp you have living with you at the time! Also, don't forget! Your new personal assistant can also help you cross the street, so no more embarrassing episodes in public that have historically made you look like a fool! A prize worth, over $15,000 per year!"
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