LMAO! I did not write dis!! .... this sounds like me tho..
"I'll hook yo ass up with Facebook links, background checks, credit reports, phone numbers, resumes, references, awards, sexual history, pictures of karate trophies and a list of the top 10 women I'd like to bang before I die. If you want a next-generation roommate who consistently blows your fucking mind with awesomeness, then hit me up. I'm ready to give you money. "
the best of luck to this crazy sum bitch!! May his "awesomeness" never die!