police humor

[wnaplay1647545503]

Found on another site.

 

The following 15 Police Comments were taken off of actual police car

videos around the country.

 

#15 "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch

out after you wear them awhile."

 

#14 "Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a

worthless document."

 

#13 "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

 

#12 "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? In case you didn't

know, that is the average speed of a

9mm bullet fired from my gun."

 

#11 "So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can

write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

 

#10 "Yes, Sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think

it will help. Oh did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"

 

#9 "Warning! You want a warning? O. K., I'm warning you not to do that

again or I'll give you another ticket."

 

#8 "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are

drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

 

#7 "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go

to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey DOO."

 

#6 "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster

oven."

 

#5 "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."

 

#4 "Just how big were those two beers?"

 

#3 "No sir we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas but now

we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."

 

#2 "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of

yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail."

 

And.................... THE BEST ONE !!!!!!!

 

#1 "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? ... You're right, we

don't. .... Sign here.

[Sawbinder]

I've used a few of those, the look on peoples faces are classic. I wish I had a camara sometimes to capture the look on peoples faces. Its awsome.