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Overheard in NYC


Sturg1647545502

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Black NYU boy: For some reason, every Asian here has a rice cooker.

Black girl: Why?

Black NYU boy: I don't know, I guess because they're Asian.

Black girl: That's so stupid. I'm black, but you don't see me with a chicken fryer.

 

Cop, taking report of stolen car: Ok, what was the color, make and model?

Metro Guy: It's cranberry and...

Cop: Cranberry's something you eat, son, your car was red.

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I like this one

 

God Squad lady: Praise Jesus! You won't be saved without Jesus! You have to start believing in Jesus to be saved! Jesus will always be there for you!

Suit #1: Would it be so awful if we pushed her out when the doors open?

Suit #2: No. Jesus will save her.

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And again

 

Drunk white man: Hey, sir. "Knish" is spelled wrong.

Indian cashier: What?

Drunk white man: The food behind the case here. You spelled "knish" wrong, and I've told you guys before and it still hasn't been fixed. Look, buddy, I've come in here ten times in the last week. I've told three other employees that the spelling is wrong, and next time I come in here it better be spelled right or the Jews are gonna come kill you.

 

Drunk white man storms out.

 

Indian cashier: That man is fucking crazy. It's knish. Is it even spelled wrong?

Woman: No. He just forgot to take his meds and now the Jews are gonna come and kill you. And by "the Jews" he means himself.

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