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BCS declares Germany winner of WWII


The King

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Good stuff from a Texas fan...

After determining the Big-12 championship game participants the BCS computers were put to work on other major contests and today the BCS declared Germany to be the winner of World War II.

"Germany put together an incredible number of victories beginning with the annexation of Austria and the Sudetenland and continuing on into conference play with defeats of Poland, France, Norway, Sweden, Denmark,

Belgium and the Netherlands" stated Goober Von Nuesbaum, chief architect of the BCS computer software. "Their only losses came against the US and Russia; however considering their entire body of work--including an incredibly tough Strength of Schedule and significant margin of victories in most battles--our computers deemed them worthy of the #1 ranking."

Questioned about the #2 ranking of the United States the BCS stated "The US only had two major victories--Japan and Germany. The computer models, unlike humans, aren't influenced by head-to-head contests--they consider each contest to be only a single, equally-weighted event. So even though the US came back from way down to beat Germany and used a couple of last minute long bombs to beat Japan, those issues aren't factored

in."

German spokesperson Bobbi Shtuppesengrubber said "Yes, we lost to the US; but we defeated #2 France on the road in only 6 weeks. It took the US several years to beat us." Germany was criticized by many for seeking dramatic victories to earn 'style points' to enhance

Germany's rankings, using their first team Stormtroopers all the way into the final minutes of several lopsided battles with their "Blitzkrieg"

offensive scheme.

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