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Quick joke


Comebackkid

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A hospital in need of help hired a new nurse. While being given a tour around the building she looked in a room and noticed a man vigorously masturbating. She stopped screamed, "WTF this cant be acceptable! That man is masturbating!" The doctor that was giving her the tour told her it was perfectly ok. "That man has a condition where he produces too much sperm and if he doesnt ejaculate at least 10 times a day his scrotum will surely explode." A little blown away, but understanding of the issue the nurse continued the tour. A few rooms down she noticed a nurse performing oral sex on another patient. She stopped and said, "Doctor that nurse is giving that man oral sex... Why??? That cant be acceptable can it????!" The doctor calmly replied, "Same condition... better insurance."

 

 

oldie but goodie

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A hospital in need of help hired a new nurse. While being given a tour around the building she looked in a room and noticed a man vigorously masturbating. She stopped screamed, "WTF this cant be acceptable! That man is masturbating!" The doctor that was giving her the tour told her it was perfectly ok. "That man has a condition where he produces too much sperm and if he doesnt ejaculate at least 10 times a day his scrotum will surely explode." A little blown away, but understanding of the issue the nurse continued the tour. A few rooms down she noticed a nurse performing oral sex on another patient. She stopped and said, "Doctor that nurse is giving that man oral sex... Why??? That cant be acceptable can it????!" The doctor calmly replied, "Same condition... better insurance."

 

 

oldie but goodie

 

Epic

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The Gynecologist Who Wanted to be a Mechanic

A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and HMO

paperwork and was burned out.

 

Hoping to try another career where skillful hands would be beneficial, he

decided to become a mechanic.

 

He went to the local technical college, signed up for evening classes,

attended diligently, and learned all he could.

 

When the time for the practical exam approached, the gynecologist prepared carefully for weeks and completed the exam with tremendous skill.

 

When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%.

Fearing an error, he called the instructor, saying, "I don't want to

appear ungrateful for such a n outstanding result, but I wonder if there is an error in the grade."

 

The instructor said, "During the exam, you took the engine apart

perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark.

"You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth

50% of the mark."

 

After a pause, the instructor added, "I gave you an extra 50% because you

did it all through the muffler, which I've never seen done in my entire

career."

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A man says to his wife, honey let me cum in your ear. Shocked at his question, she replies with a no. He asks why not, she tells him she could go deaf or something. He pauses for a second and says bullshit, I cum in your mouth and you never shut the fuck up.
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A man says to his wife, honey let me cum in your ear. Shocked at his question, she replies with a no. He asks why not, she tells him she could go deaf or something. He pauses for a second and says bullshit, I cum in your mouth and you never shut the fuck up.

 

Epic

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A man says to his wife, honey let me cum in your ear. Shocked at his question, she replies with a no. He asks why not, she tells him she could go deaf or something. He pauses for a second and says bullshit, I cum in your mouth and you never shut the fuck up.

 

I lol'd

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A man says to his wife, honey let me cum in your ear. Shocked at his question, she replies with a no. He asks why not, she tells him she could go deaf or something. He pauses for a second and says bullshit, I cum in your mouth and you never shut the fuck up.

 

LOL!

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The Gynecologist Who Wanted to be a Mechanic

A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and HMO

paperwork and was burned out.

 

Hoping to try another career where skillful hands would be beneficial, he

decided to become a mechanic.

 

He went to the local technical college, signed up for evening classes,

attended diligently, and learned all he could.

 

When the time for the practical exam approached, the gynecologist prepared carefully for weeks and completed the exam with tremendous skill.

 

When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%.

Fearing an error, he called the instructor, saying, "I don't want to

appear ungrateful for such a n outstanding result, but I wonder if there is an error in the grade."

 

The instructor said, "During the exam, you took the engine apart

perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark.

"You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth

50% of the mark."

 

After a pause, the instructor added, "I gave you an extra 50% because you

did it all through the muffler, which I've never seen done in my entire

career."

 

 

Way too long, but hilarious

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A man buys himself a new harley, he adds a personalized emblem to the front of it. Problem is whenever it rains it keeps falling off. He finally figured out if he rubbed ky jelly on it, it won't fall off. His girlfriend comes home from work one day saying that her parents wanted them to come over for dinner. It was a nice day so they decided to take the bike.

 

When they get there, she tells him to not say anything at dinner. He asks why, she says whoever speaks has to do the dishes. They walk in and the man glances in the kitchen to see dishes piled damn near to the ceiling. He says to himself I'll get someone to say something.

 

So in the middle of dinner, he grabs his girlfriend throws her on the table and starts fucking her. Her parents stare in disbelief, but don't say a word. He finishes and can't believe it didn't work. He then grabs her mom and starts fucking her on the table again, no one says anything. Disappointed he sits back down, trying to figure out another strategy. He looks outside and notices its starting to sprinkle. He stands up and removes the ky jelly from his pocket, only to hear her dad scream I'll do the dishes.

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Guest tbutera2112
A man buys himself a new harley, he adds a personalized emblem to the front of it. Problem is whenever it rains it keeps falling off. He finally figured out if he rubbed ky jelly on it, it won't fall off. His girlfriend comes home from work one day saying that her parents wanted them to come over for dinner. It was a nice day so they decided to take the bike.

 

When they get there, she tells him to not say anything at dinner. He asks why, she says whoever speaks has to do the dishes. They walk in and the man glances in the kitchen to see dishes piled damn near to the ceiling. He says to himself I'll get someone to say something.

 

So in the middle of dinner, he grabs his girlfriend throws her on the table and starts fucking her. Her parents stare in disbelief, but don't say a word. He finishes and can't believe it didn't work. He then grabs her mom and starts fucking her on the table again, no one says anything. Disappointed he sits back down, trying to figure out another strategy. He looks outside and notices its starting to sprinkle. He stands up and removes the ky jelly from his pocket, only to hear her dad scream I'll do the dishes.

 

haha

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