Buck531 Posted April 10, 2010 Report Share Posted April 10, 2010 http://semo.craigslist.org/cto/1672654758.html email this posting to a friend southeast MO craigslist > for sale / wanted > cars & trucks - by owner please flag with care: miscategorized prohibited spam/overpost best of craigslist Avoid scams and fraud by dealing locally! Beware any deal involving Western Union, Moneygram, wire transfer, cashier check, money order, shipping, escrow, or any promise of transaction protection/certification/guarantee. More info 2002 Focus – good reliable first car - $2000 (Cape Girardeau) Date: 2010-04-01, 10:33PM CDT Reply to: sale-fm8x7-1672654758@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?] Looking for a first car for a teen? This car is absolutely brilliant. It’s got low mileage (68k), has been super reliable, and is excellent on gas. Since you’re likely paying for the gas, this will make things much cheaper on you. I average like 37MPG to a tank. And with such low mileage, it’ll work great for a long long time. But you wanna know the best reason to buy this car for your kid? It’s slow as shit. You don’t have to worry about speeding tickets or accidents in this baby. Your kid could have a 1 mile run and hit a brick wall not wearing a seatbelt and not be going fast enough to do shit. And there won’t be any sense in him getting some shitty ass fart can off of eBay – this car has the super slow SPI engine, no sense in trying to make it any faster. It’s a 4-door, so your kid won’t try to put gay ass Lambo doors on it. It is still possible to fit this with a body kit, but if you’d like, for an extra $200, I can stab him in the face if he does this. It’s a 5-speed, so your kid can’t talk on his cell phone while playing Gameboy and smoking pot – he’ll have to actually pay attention. It also means you won’t have to pay for an automatic transmission when your kid beats the hell out of it. It’s got a new clutch and new tires, so you’ll know if he does burnouts. After all, I’m sure YOU’RE the one paying for tires, right? It’s got an aftermarket head unit in it, so your kid won’t fuck it up when him and his buddies try to wire in a “phat ass system”. It’s already had the speakers replaced too, so he won’t have to tear the door cards on and then look like a retard when he can’t get them back on. It’s got manual windows too, so he can’t fuck up the window motors when he rolls one of his friends heads up in it as a joke. A new battery means when he leaves his headlights on, it won’t leave you totally stranded. But really though, one of the best parts is that, because it is a 4 door, it will be somewhat embarrassing for him to be seen in. I’m sure you get pissed at him from time to time. Hell, you’re probably mad at him for harassing you into buying him a first car. So get this one. It has no A/C, so you’ll know he’s suffering every time you get mad at him. Pretty satisfying. It’ll bring a smile to your face too, to know he’s rolling around looking like a faggot in a Ford Focus. So buy this car for your kid. You won’t regret it Contact: 573-334-4363 Location: Cape Girardeauit's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests http://images.craigslist.org/3nb3me3lb5V25Q55U6a4149d8804590341d46.jpg PostingID: 1672654758 Copyright © 2010 craigslist, inc.terms of useprivacy policyfeedback forum Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AWW$HEEET Posted April 10, 2010 Report Share Posted April 10, 2010 get something 5 cylinder turbo with good gas mileage. but to ensure the best gas mileage, I would post in the tech section. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jerrodh Posted April 10, 2010 Report Share Posted April 10, 2010 Full of win. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jeffro Posted April 10, 2010 Report Share Posted April 10, 2010 that. is. awesome.! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
31rx7 Posted April 10, 2010 Report Share Posted April 10, 2010 Excellent. I will nominate it for Best of Craigslist. Saturn SL1 sedans are also good for teens, particularly the ugly duckling original body (1991 - 1995). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nitrousbird Posted April 10, 2010 Report Share Posted April 10, 2010 What I read there were some excellent sales points. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crossle Posted April 10, 2010 Report Share Posted April 10, 2010 That is fantastic, lot of truth in that listing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImUrOBGYN Posted April 10, 2010 Report Share Posted April 10, 2010 Hilarious. Read this last night on Jalopnik. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radio Flyer1647545514 Posted April 10, 2010 Report Share Posted April 10, 2010 "It’s a 5-speed, so your kid can’t talk on his cell phone while playing Gameboy and smoking pot." Awesome quote. If I ever sell cars I will use this as a selling point. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darksrt4 Posted April 10, 2010 Report Share Posted April 10, 2010 "for an extra $200 i will stab him in the face when we does" that is classic! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave1647545494 Posted April 10, 2010 Report Share Posted April 10, 2010 thats awesome Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Removed Posted April 10, 2010 Report Share Posted April 10, 2010 good shit right there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unfunnyryan Posted April 10, 2010 Report Share Posted April 10, 2010 Holy shit that thing is sweet. I bet I could put a mad exhaust on that and do BYRUNOUTZ all day long. Probably smoke some of the C6's on here. Now to get dad to buy it for me.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jerrodh Posted April 11, 2010 Report Share Posted April 11, 2010 Excellent. I will nominate it for Best of Craigslist. Saturn SL1 sedans are also good for teens, particularly the ugly duckling original body (1991 - 1995). Through in the SW1 for added embarrasment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Habitual Sinner Posted April 11, 2010 Report Share Posted April 11, 2010 Epic. I had to print it out. It almost deserves a frame. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patterson Posted April 11, 2010 Report Share Posted April 11, 2010 Dude is full of win. As I have witnessed here recently kids are dumb asses. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
6 Speed S4 Posted April 12, 2010 Report Share Posted April 12, 2010 haha that is badass. Full of win! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2 Sweet Posted April 12, 2010 Report Share Posted April 12, 2010 Awesome Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xyster101 Posted April 12, 2010 Report Share Posted April 12, 2010 So true! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FourString Posted April 12, 2010 Report Share Posted April 12, 2010 Definite win. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rally Pat Posted April 12, 2010 Report Share Posted April 12, 2010 I shed a tear over the amount of awesome in that post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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