Forrest Gump 9 Posted August 28, 2010 Report Share Posted August 28, 2010 This is a GREAT offer, which can save you a lot of money. No need to thank me, just passing on... Dear Senator Harkin, As a native Iowan and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you. My primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal alien stems from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out. Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005. Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000 a year. Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications, as well as 'in-state' tuition rates for many colleges throughout the United States for my son. Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car insurance premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my car. If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative. Thank you for your assistance. Your Loyal Constituent, (hoping to reach 'illegal alien' status rather than just a bonafide citizen of the USA ) First ans Last Name__________________ City_________________ State________________ Get your Forms (NOW)!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flat tire Posted August 28, 2010 Report Share Posted August 28, 2010 lmao Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Das Borgen Posted August 28, 2010 Report Share Posted August 28, 2010 quite a riveting tale, chap Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImUrOBGYN Posted August 30, 2010 Report Share Posted August 30, 2010 Funny, but it's missing some points and misconstruing others. I like some good smart ass writing, but sometims I think these things mislead some people on the actual laws and why they are created. Too many people get all thier info from things liek this instead of doing their own unbiased research. Well, I guess that's my being a 'stick in the mud' for the day. haha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KennyFKINPowerz Posted August 30, 2010 Report Share Posted August 30, 2010 +1,000,000,000 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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