Can someone please explain

[Otis Nice]

You do realize it's ".gif"

 

Nothing gets by you.

[blue98ls1]

Nothing gets by you.

 

[Buck531]

https://bits.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/05/23/battle-over-gif-pronunciation-erupts/

 

 

[unfunnyryan]

Popcorn.jif

 

its called popcoin m8

[gillbot]

Dogecoin

[Otis Nice]

Bitcoin.geoff

[Not Brian]

say pop

pop

say corn

corn

say pop corn

sniff

popcoin

[ShowHBK]

That feeling when you're browsing the Kitchen and your IQ gets so low that you accidentally reply with the entire Declaration of Independence.

 

When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

 

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security. — Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.

 

He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.

 

He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.

 

He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.

 

He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their Public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.

 

He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.

 

He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected, whereby the Legislative Powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.

 

He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.

 

He has obstructed the Administration of Justice by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary Powers.

 

He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.

 

He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harass our people and eat out their substance.

 

He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.

 

He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil Power.

 

He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:

 

For quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:

 

For protecting them, by a mock Trial from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:

 

For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:

 

For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:

 

For depriving us in many cases, of the benefit of Trial by Jury:

 

For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences:

 

For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies

 

For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:

 

For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.

 

He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.

 

He has plundered our seas, ravaged our coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.

 

He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation, and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & Perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.

 

He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.

 

He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.

 

In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince, whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.

 

Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our British brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.

 

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these united Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States, that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. — And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes, and our sacred Honor.

[unfunnyryan]

I believe that Masturbation is wrong, however it can be justified in certain extreme circumstances. I will examine several scenarios and determine their wrongness

 

Scenario 1: I jerk off to my crushes Instagram pics

 

Is this a sin: Yes

 

This is a sin because I am committing lust, a sexual act, on someone who did not consent. I am thus stealing her humanity and reducing her to a sexual object.

 

Scenario 2: I jerk off to a porn actress

 

Is this a sin: It might be

 

I am committing lust unto the actress, however she did imply consent by uploading the video to a porn website specifically meant for masturbation.

 

Scenario 3: I jerk off to my own imagination

 

Is this a sin: No

 

Since I am using my own imagination, I am become a creator and a dreamer, just like God himself. By putting myself in God's position I can better understand the Bible. Not only is this a non-sin, it may be spiritually healthy.

 

Scenario 4: I fuck a sex robot

 

Is this a sin: Yes

 

The Robot, is not a human being, and since I am having sex with it, I am implying that human love can be obtained by objects, or that objects and humans have the same value. This is insulting to God's creation and thus a sin.

 

Scenario 5: I jerk off to gay porn

 

Is this a sin: maybe

 

On one hand, homosexuality is a sin and the actors in the video are sinning. But, they did imply consent to me jerking off by uploading it to a porn website. But is it a sin to masturbate to sin? Perhaps God appreciates me only jerking off instead of asking out a boy in real life. Or maybe I'm deluding myself.

 

Scenario 6: I jerk off to myself in the mirror

 

Is this a sin: No

 

I am a good looking guy and I occasionally jerk off to myself. I'm sure other boys in my grade have jerked off to me as well. I consent to myself masturbating to myself and I am a human worthy of love, there is thus nothing wrong with this.

[ShowHBK]

Currently, My favorite book is The Catcher in the Rye, by J.D. Salinger

I wanted to share it with all of you.

 

If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you'll probably want to know is

where I was born, an what my lousy childhood was like, and how my parents were

occupied and all before they had me, and all that David Copperfield kind of crap, but I

don't feel like going into it, if you want to know the truth. In the first place, that stuff

bores me, and in the second place, my parents would have about two hemorrhages apiece

if I told anything pretty personal about them. They're quite touchy about anything like

that, especially my father. They're nice and all--I'm not saying that--but they're also

touchy as hell. Besides, I'm not going to tell you my whole goddam autobiography or

anything. I'll just tell you about this madman stuff that happened to me around last

Christmas just before I got pretty run-down and had to come out here and take it easy. I

mean that's all I told D.B. about, and he's my brother and all. He's in Hollywood. That

isn't too far from this crumby place, and he comes over and visits me practically every

week end. He's going to drive me home when I go home next month maybe. He just got a

Jaguar. One of those little English jobs that can do around two hundred miles an hour. It

cost him damn near four thousand bucks. He's got a lot of dough, now. He didn't use to.

He used to be just a regular writer, when he was home. He wrote this terrific book of

short stories, The Secret Goldfish, in case you never heard of him. The best one in it was

"The Secret Goldfish." It was about this little kid that wouldn't let anybody look at his

goldfish because he'd bought it with his own money. It killed me. Now he's out in

Hollywood, D.B., being a prostitute. If there's one thing I hate, it's the movies. Don't even

mention them to me.

 

 

Where I want to start telling is the day I left Pencey Prep. Pencey Prep is this

school that's in Agerstown, Pennsylvania. You probably heard of it. You've probably seen

the ads, anyway. They advertise in about a thousand magazines, always showing some

hotshot guy on a horse jumping over a fence. Like as if all you ever did at Pencey was

play polo all the time. I never even once saw a horse anywhere near the place. And

underneath the guy on the horse's picture, it always says: "Since 1888 we have been

molding boys into splendid, clear-thinking young men." Strictly for the birds. They don't

do any damn more molding at Pencey than they do at any other school. And I didn't know

anybody there that was splendid and clear-thinking and all. Maybe two guys. If that

many. And they probably came to Pencey that way.

Anyway, it was the Saturday of the football game with Saxon Hall. The game

with Saxon Hall was supposed to be a very big deal around Pencey. It was the last game

of the year, and you were supposed to commit suicide or something if old Pencey didn't

win. I remember around three o'clock that afternoon I was standing way the hell up on

top of Thomsen Hill, right next to this crazy cannon that was in the Revolutionary War

and all. You could see the whole field from there, and you could see the two teams

bashing each other all over the place. You couldn't see the grandstand too hot, but you

could hear them all yelling, deep and terrific on the Pencey side, because practically the

whole school except me was there, and scrawny and faggy on the Saxon Hall side,

because the visiting team hardly ever brought many people with them.

There were never many girls at all at the football games. Only seniors were

allowed to bring girls with them. It was a terrible school, no matter how you looked at it.

I like to be somewhere at least where you can see a few girls around once in a while, even

if they're only scratching their arms or blowing their noses or even just giggling or

something. Old Selma Thurmer--she was the headmaster's daughter--showed up at the

games quite often, but she wasn't exactly the type that drove you mad with desire. She

was a pretty nice girl, though. I sat next to her once in the bus from Agerstown and we

sort of struck up a conversation. I liked her. She had a big nose and her nails were all

bitten down and bleedy-looking and she had on those damn falsies that point all over the

place, but you felt sort of sorry for her. What I liked about her, she didn't give you a lot of

horse manure about what a great guy her father was. She probably knew what a phony

slob he was.

 

 

The reason I was standing way up on Thomsen Hill, instead of down at the game,

was because I'd just got back from New York with the fencing team. I was the goddam

manager of the fencing team. Very big deal. We'd gone in to New York that morning for

this fencing meet with McBurney School. Only, we didn't have the meet. I left all the

foils and equipment and stuff on the goddam subway. It wasn't all my fault. I had to keep

getting up to look at this map, so we'd know where to get off. So we got back to Pencey

around two-thirty instead of around dinnertime. The whole team ostracized me the whole

way back on the train. It was pretty funny, in a way.

 

 

The other reason I wasn't down at the game was because I was on my way to say

good-by to old Spencer, my history teacher. He had the grippe, and I figured I probably

wouldn't see him again till Christmas vacation started. He wrote me this note saying he

wanted to see me before I went home. He knew I wasn't coming back to Pencey.

I forgot to tell you about that. They kicked me out. I wasn't supposed to come

back after Christmas vacation on account of I was flunking four subjects and not applying

myself and all. They gave me frequent warning to start applying myself--especially

around midterms, when my parents came up for a conference with old Thurmer--but I

didn't do it. So I got the ax. They give guys the ax quite frequently at Pencey. It has a

very good academic rating, Pencey. It really does.

 

 

Anyway, it was December and all, and it was cold as a witch's teat, especially on

top of that stupid hill. I only had on my reversible and no gloves or anything. The week

before that, somebody'd stolen my camel's-hair coat right out of my room, with my furlined gloves right in the pocket and all. Pencey was full of crooks. Quite a few guys came

 

 

from these very wealthy families, but it was full of crooks anyway. The more expensive a

school is, the more crooks it has--I'm not kidding. Anyway, I kept standing next to that

crazy cannon, looking down at the game and freezing my ass off. Only, I wasn't watching

the game too much. What I was really hanging around for, I was trying to feel some kind

of a good-by. I mean I've left schools and places I didn't even know I was leaving them. I

hate that. I don't care if it's a sad good-by or a bad goodby, but when I leave a place I like

to know I'm leaving it. If you don't, you feel even worse.

 

 

I was lucky. All of a sudden I thought of something that helped make me know I

was getting the hell out. I suddenly remembered this time, in around October, that I and

Robert Tichener and Paul Campbell were chucking a football around, in front of the

academic building. They were nice guys, especially Tichener. It was just before dinner

and it was getting pretty dark out, but we kept chucking the ball around anyway. It kept

getting darker and darker, and we could hardly see the ball any more, but we didn't want

to stop doing what we were doing. Finally we had to. This teacher that taught biology,

Mr. Zambesi, stuck his head out of this window in the academic building and told us to

go back to the dorm and get ready for dinner. If I get a chance to remember that kind of

stuff, I can get a good-by when I need one--at least, most of the time I can. As soon as I

got it, I turned around and started running down the other side of the hill, toward old

Spencer's house. He didn't live on the campus. He lived on Anthony Wayne Avenue.

I ran all the way to the main gate, and then I waited a second till I got my breath. I

have no wind, if you want to know the truth. I'm quite a heavy smoker, for one thing--that

is, I used to be. They made me cut it out. Another thing, I grew six and a half inches last

year. That's also how I practically got t.b. and came out here for all these goddam

checkups and stuff. I'm pretty healthy, though.

 

 

Anyway, as soon as I got my breath back I ran across Route 204. It was icy as hell

and I damn near fell down. I don't even know what I was running for--I guess I just felt

like it. After I got across the road, I felt like I was sort of disappearing. It was that kind of

a crazy afternoon, terrifically cold, and no sun out or anything, and you felt like you were

disappearing every time you crossed a road.

 

 

Boy, I rang that doorbell fast when I got to old Spencer's house. I was really

frozen. My ears were hurting and I could hardly move my fingers at all. "C'mon, c'mon,"

I said right out loud, almost, "somebody open the door." Finally old Mrs. Spencer

opened. it. They didn't have a maid or anything, and they always opened the door

themselves. They didn't have too much dough.

 

 

"Holden!" Mrs. Spencer said. "How lovely to see you! Come in, dear! Are you

frozen to death?" I think she was glad to see me. She liked me. At least, I think she did.

Boy, did I get in that house fast. "How are you, Mrs. Spencer?" I said. "How's Mr.

Spencer?"

 

 

"Let me take your coat, dear," she said. She didn't hear me ask her how Mr.

Spencer was. She was sort of deaf.

 

 

She hung up my coat in the hall closet, and I sort of brushed my hair back with

my hand. I wear a crew cut quite frequently and I never have to comb it much. "How've

you been, Mrs. Spencer?" I said again, only louder, so she'd hear me.

 

 

"I've been just fine, Holden." She closed the closet door. "How have you been?"

The way she asked me, I knew right away old Spencer'd told her I'd been kicked out.

"Fine," I said. "How's Mr. Spencer? He over his grippe yet?"

 

 

"Over it! Holden, he's behaving like a perfect--I don't know what. . . He's in his

room, dear. Go right in."

[SpaceGhost]

Fuck you Grant, I made your mom ugly cry last night, she left the lens cap on the camcorder, it’s amateur hour over there. Give your balls as tug ya tit fucker.

 

-Shorsey