SteveChase Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 (edited) You may have already seen this site, but some of these posts are classic.http://mydrunktexts.com Edited May 20, 2009 by SteveChase spelling Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrmako777 Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 link doesnt work right...tryhttp://mydrunktexts.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveChase Posted May 20, 2009 Author Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 thanks, fixed it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
warpspeed Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Received this text last night from a hammered friend: "Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone." MDT Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveChase Posted May 20, 2009 Author Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Here's one I thought was classic...Last night after hooking up with a hot girl i texted her at 5:49am:"You're so beautiful. How did I ever get you?" She replied, "I was drunk." ... ouch. MDT Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
V4junkie Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 (edited) Last night I sent "Spontaneous pelvic thrust in the cereal aisle of Rock'n'Roll Ralph's. Boom." some good stuff on there Edited May 20, 2009 by V4junkie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goldie Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Bitch im gonna put blood on your mothafuckin happy meal!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R1Limited Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 lolReceived/sent these texts last night. recv'd: "It's really small, you know, but the sex is wonderful." me: "You mean he's rich?" recv'd: "Yeah. Exactly." MDT Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chrome Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Classic Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CleaveTheGreat Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 That site is hilarious Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveChase Posted May 20, 2009 Author Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 I laughed my ass off when I found it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EagleCock Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 i wanna kick your puppy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC51 John Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Last night, I sent my boyfriend sum nude pics of me. Later I get a txt from my dad askn "when did u get a tatoo?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RSVDon Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Sent last night: "oooooh this is bad...feels like i just pooped a pine cone! it hurts so bad boobie! can ya rip your pooper or does it just keep expanding?!?" MDT Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wrillo Posted August 17, 2009 Report Share Posted August 17, 2009 (612): We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AOW Posted August 18, 2009 Report Share Posted August 18, 2009 (+ 44): i was licking her nipple and thought she was Lactating.................. turns out it was just a boil! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dustinsn3485 Posted August 18, 2009 Report Share Posted August 18, 2009 (613): she was blowing me and i farted, she gave me a high five and kept going. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AOW Posted August 18, 2009 Report Share Posted August 18, 2009 (614): went to a strip club for my bachelor party. about to get a lap dance and realized that when she turned around ... it was my mom.... Only in OH-IO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveChase Posted August 19, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 19, 2009 (614): Went to a strip club for my bachelor party. About to get a lap dance and realized that when she turned around ... It was my mom.... Only in oh-iowtf???? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jagr Posted August 19, 2009 Report Share Posted August 19, 2009 (edited) (254): You could play connect the dots with the chicks Ive fucked in this room. (610 ): Is it wrong to hit on the hot manager at Wendys? She was flirting back... but I mean its Wendys. (Recv'd) Dont judge. Maybe she's got cool interests.Like sex. Girl was ridin' me, things were getting pretty hot...it was diarrhea and u could see the poppy seeds Edited August 19, 2009 by jagr Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveChase Posted August 19, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 19, 2009 Girl was ridin' me, things were getting pretty hot...it was diarrhea and u could see the poppy seeds Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wrillo Posted October 9, 2009 Report Share Posted October 9, 2009 from textsfromlastnight.com(213): she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jblosser Posted October 9, 2009 Report Share Posted October 9, 2009 (310): i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.(502): i was fucking her during the storm and the house got struck by lightning, knocking out the power at the same time as when i finished...I AM ZUES! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebbbusa Posted October 14, 2009 Report Share Posted October 14, 2009 Good link! Thanks!(614): (sent) i'm in a dark room wearing a sumbraro and i hear mexicans talkinh...was i deported? (received) dude, ur in my closet and we're outside watching cheech and chong... (sent)...oh....i love this weed...LMAO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KruelHouse Posted October 15, 2009 Report Share Posted October 15, 2009 (206): If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it' date=' oh uh uh oh[/url'](413): I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.(610): I am going to masterbate my troubles away!!!LMFAO!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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