Battered
How do we love thee, Black & Decker CP120B 20 Watt Power Backup Battery Pack? Let us count the ways:
P is for portable power, to run and recharge your mobile devices anywhere!
I is for the insightful instruction manual, which advises the user to “Watch what you are doing” and “Use common sense”. Thanks, guys!
E is for explosion hazard! Some of this unit’s components tend to produce arcs or sparks!
C is for combustion hazard! Storing the Pocket Power pack at temperatures over 170F for over two hours may cause fire!
E is for electrical shock hazard! Disassemble this unit at your own risk!
O is for overload protection, which isn’t all that funny, come to think of it!
F is for free drawstring carrying bag, because you don’t want to be like those other losers carrying their battery packs right out in the open!
S is for sine wave, which this unit produces but does not properly filter, possibly causing buzzing sounds through nearby stereo systems!
H is for hype like “up to 5 hours of usage”, which is meaningless since they don’t specify which devices can run that long!
I is for iPhone, which (near as we can tell) you can’t charge with the USB jacks on this! The AC jack should still work, though!
T is for trademark! After Black & Decker spent decades making their name synonymous with high-quality power tools, now they’ll apparently slap it on any old piece of junk!