Mowgli1647545497

Profit? Ain't no profit in that.

I didn't just read about someone bragging on their mom's car did I?

 

Here's my coupon for my last 2 minutes back please.

the front fearing ?

Yes. The kitchen thread was the tamest newb beatdown I've seen in awhile. They used to be SO entertaining.

 

Welcome to the site.

Its fake - the gun flashes give it away - oh and the retarded acting.

Fake.

Are you an LLC?

Do you do Corp to Corp?

Are you looking to get hired on? I assume Seopro is you only. W2? 1099?

I assume you're a citizen and not on H2 via Seopro?

Have you looked over my list of openings?

Any experience in EDI with GreatPlains and or Axapta?

Biztalk?

How much experience in java in a non-webpage environment?

The webpage leaves abit ambiguous. If no resume do you have a portfolio or account/client list?

Just went back and squinted and saw the line and the dot.

 

Dudes, thats a camera and/or lens anomaly, thats no object at all.

 

Bah humbug.

I play for both teams.

 

BTW - the Cobra was faster.

 

*ducks for cover*

Originally posted by Matt Sterbator:

Team Cobra-what? They're all trading their cars in for GM products graemlins/grin2.gif

True story.

Can I join? We have the same engine.

Waxed the CTS-V, pics to follow. Oh wait this is your thread... sorry.

I shall now take the opportunity to compare and contrast this DSM burning video with the previous Corvette burning video:

 

No Ricer asshat children going "Ah HA that was great! We got it on tape! Sweet. Ha ha ha ha ha...."

 

Discuss.

Here's the "modern" History book version of WWII. Abridged.

 

Hitler killed alot of jews for no reason. Doesn't get away with it.

 

America drops atomic bombs on Japan for no reason. Gets away with it.

 

*<font -1>Everything else is just "detail" to be ignored. Clouds conclusion.</font>

 

Conclusion: WWII, 50% for bad guys getting their come-upance.

 

**But someday evil America will fall too.

 

The End.

Not over the security council seat bid, but over the whole whitewashing of history thing.

 

Chinese Rampage

Lets let a few of those stray in Wisconsin...

I see nothing. What am I missing?

Bright side: at least it wasn't the GTO. I'd be calling for blood then. Good luck getting it back and here's hoping the guys that took it spend a night in the pokey with Hector the Manlover.

EDIT: I just read the other post. Carry on.

"Engine wear actually decreases as oil ages."

 

Interesting

The Article.

Originally posted by Trouble Maker:

Also I drive a ton (30k in 1.5 years on my S4), and I don't know of one spot that has been fixed from the winter potholes since it's gotten nice out...

Wait til a mayoral election year. Thats when the potholes get fixed.

Originally posted by David Putty:

... I took a big chunk out of my 401 for engagement ring...

There's your first problem.

 

...

 

Hell I'm happy I only owe $4,000 this year instead of $20,000.

 

I look at it as paying for blacktop on roads.

I was thinking the same thing - "what, are they the Three Stooges or something? Put out the fucking fire you asshats."

Forgot to add - please PM with a resume, don't reply to this thread or I'll miss your post most likely. If my mailbox gets full by all means yell in the thread. But I don't really read these threads - I just come here to post. smile.gif

Position: VBA Developer

Description: VBA Developer to maintain and support five ITRM Reporting Access database applications. Will create monthly and ad hoc reports in Access, Word, and Excel, as well as document application functionality and processes. Responsiblities will also include conducting risk assessment tests on systems to enure operations in accordance with Information Security requirements and identification of vulnerabilities, and assist in implementation and administration of systems and procesures to ensure protection of information.

Required Skills: VBA, ADO, DAO, Excel, Access, SQL, and Technical Writing

 

 

 

 

Position: .Net Developers

Description: Detail-oriented individual with experience performing analysis, detailed design, development, and testing of stand-alone, networked, and Internet-based applications in Windows 200/XP environments. Must be knowledgeable in issues regarding network and inter-network security, troubleshooting, topopology, protocols (IPX/SPX, TCP/IP, SNMP, SMTP, and FTP), hardware, servers, and utilities.

Required Skills: VB (.Net), ASP.Net, C# (.Net), NET Web Services, Oracle 8/8i/9 (PL/SQL), SQL Server (Transact-SQL), and

 

standard SQL syntax.

 

 

 

 

Position: Flash Developer

Description: Flash Developer to create system specs code, and unit test Flash Presentations with each screen of Sungard Tool. Must be able to create a Flash Presentation type application and have Action Script experience, as well as XML data and Java class interface experience.

Required Skills: Java, XML, Flash Presentation, and Flash Action Script. Must have six years of experience in programming and systems analysis.

Desired Skills: Project Management experience is preferred.

 

 

 

 

Position: Project Lead

Description: Project Lead to support functions (update plans, issues, meeting minutes, financial reports, etc.). Will serve in a lead role under a Project Manager and lead a general IT project or multiple small scale projects, including: planning, execution, timing, functionality, quality, communications, and cost. Must be able to apply project management and SDLC processes to projects from the original concept through the final implementation and ensure alignment with company standards and strategies.

Required Skills: Must be self-movitated with skill in teamwork, project management, Excel and Word. Preferrably candidate will have at least six years experience in IT and two years proven project leadership including: PLC/SDLC process, facilitation, negotiation, delegation, mentoring, etc.

 

 

 

Position: Project Manager

Description: Project Manager to work with another CPE lead to execute all aspects of development release life cycle to deploy approximately thirty projects. Will instruct, direct, and check the work of other applications development personnel.

 

Must be able to lead team and perform program design, coding, testing, debugging, documentation, and QA review.

Required Skills: Must have full technical knowledge of all phases of applications programming as well as six years experience in programming and systems analysis. Project Management, teamwork, written communication, leadership, self-motivation, Lotus Notes, Word, and Excel.

 

 

 

Position: QA & Test Analyst

Description: Tester to create and execute test plans for systems. Under direct supervision, consultant will develop, implement and administer systems and business recovery programs and plans.

Required Skills: Test Director, XML, Excel, Lotus Notes, Technical Writing

 

 

 

 

Position: J2EE Architect

Description: J2EE Expert/Solutions Architect to develop web services and server components with foundational J2EE frameworks. Will perform Object Oriented Development from functional requirements, use cases, and architecture using UML based technologies and learn and communication new technologies to various audiences. Must analyze current technical environment to detect critical deficiencies and recommend solutions for improvement.

Required Skills: Leadership, Written/Oral Communication, Java based Web Applications, J2EE, Object Oriented Solutions, UML Methodologies, JSP, Servlets, JDBC, EJB, XML, XML Schema, XLST, JAXP, Web Application Design

 

 

 

Position: Java Developer

Description: Java Developer to analyze code for defects, change it, and test fixes. Must have three years experience in programming and systems analysis.

Required Skills: Java, SQL, XML, WebSphere, JSP/Servlet, Struts, Tiles, Eclipse, Ant, CVS, JUnit

 

 

 

 

Position: Project Manager -J2EE

Description: Project Manager to lead two segments of J2EE foundation (shared libraries, design, and development guidelines) and focus on consumption, maintenance and governance with application teams. Will be responsible for: program design, coding, testing, debugging, documentation, and QA review. Will be the leader for projects with small budgets or limited duration and will direct and monitor the work of the team.

Required Skills: Must have full technical knowledge of all phases of applications programming. Six years experience in

 

programming and systems analysis. J2EE.

 

 

 

 

Position: Linux Administrator

Description: Network Admin to provide daily Linux Administration supporting around 160 developers working in a configuration of 21 systems. Will be responsible for the following: Services scripting; System monitoring, Security compliance and administration; Application deployment; Patch Management; and NIS, NFS and automount configuration and maintenance. Must have IBM WAS knowledge and six years experinece in data or voice communications network engineering and

 

systems analysis.

Required Skills: Linux, WebSphere

Desired Skills: Project Management experience.

 

 

 

 

Position: VB Developer

Description: Visual Basic Developer to design, develop, and unit test. Will interact with GIS team.

Required Skills: VB, SQL, Stored Procedures, ASP, Design, and J2EE

 

 

 

 

Position: Windows Server Admin

Description: Windows Server Adminstrator to design, develop, test, debug, and implement complex hardware and software components, tools, and utilities required for operations, maintenance, and control of systems. Will coordinate with users to determine requirements; review systems under development and related documentation; coordinate the activities of the team;

and monitor schedules and costs.

Required Skills: Windows, Six years of technical software/hardware analysis, programming, and installation.

Desired Skills: Project Management experience.

 

 

 

 

Position: QA Coordinator

Description: QA Coordinator to coordinate test environments, scenarios, and strategy for a PeopleTools upgrade. Will work in the following areas:

Testing Ownership, Test Script Consolidation/Verification, Testing Tool Execution/Process Coordination, Testing Tool

Setup/Administration, Testing Communications

Required Skills: PeopleSoft Financials (Accounts Payable, Accounts Receivable, General Ledger), Mercury Interactive

 

LoadRunner for stress testing.

 

 

 

 

Position: Senior Business Analyst

Description: Business Analyst with excellent experience working with the business users, managing their expectations, while bringing their systems in compliance with Sarbanes Oxley. Previous experience with Sarbanes Oxley is not required for this position, since the high level analysis to come into compliance is already completed. This role will require gathering requirements, performing testing, and providing documentation. This environment requires someone who is outgoing, hardworking, and easy to work with.

Desired Skills: Project management skills are preferred.

 

 

 

Position: Unix System Administrator

Description: Unix System Administrator to provide daily support of a Unix/Linux environment. Will design, develop, test,

debug, and implement complex hardware and software components, tools, and utilities required for operations, maintenance, and

control of system. Candidate will also coordinate with users to determine requirements and will review the system under

 

development and related documentation. Must make complex modifications to the existing hardware and software to fit specialized needs and configurations and maintain program libraries and technical documentation.

Required Skills: Must be skilled with Unix Server Administration.

 

 

 

Position: Web Architect

Description: Web Architect to perform critical evaluation and selection of components (as related to interface development/external services to eliminate or reduce legacy packaged software application enhancements). Will be responsible for identifying and documenting requirements, applying business case and risk management logic, translation of requirements from business to IT, and delivering project plans for implementation. Will architect solutions using application platforms, databases, and object technology. Will design application development solution delivery environment and analyst client business processes.

Required Skills: Service Oriented Architecture, Web Services concepts, Service Modeling, Business Process Management, WSDL, SOAP, XML schema and namespaces, J2EE.

Desired Skills: Indus Passport and PeopleSoft Integration, WebMethods, WebLogic, MQ Series, MQSI, Sonic Software, Apache/TomCat, .NET, IBM Rational Tools.

 

 

 

 

Position: Web Developer

Description: Web Developer to design and develop web sites and web based applications. Consultant must have 4-5 years of similar experience.

Required Skills: Graphic Software: Adobe Photoshop, Flash, Macromedia Tools

Databases: Access, SQL Server 2000, Oracle, MySQL

Languages/Tools: ASP, HTML, DHTML, VB, VBScript, COM Objects, PHP, Crystal Reports, XML, JSP, ActiveX, Dreamweaver, Visual

 

Interdev, VSS

Also necessary is good communication skills with both technical and non-technical people, as well as the ability to deal directly with clients at their level and troubleshoot problems quickly.