A lady had been married to a farmer all of her life. They had cows and
horses on their farm and also grew a number of crops for sale at the
local
farmers market.
While shopping at the local grocery store for a few items that she and
her
husband did not raise or grow for themselves, she came across a contest
form
while in the store. So she completed their jingle and mailed it off to
the
Carnation Milk Company in an effort to win a cash prize which had been
offered for the best entry regarding those little cans of milk found on
grocery shelves. Carnation had furnished the first line of jingle with
these
words, "I like Carnation best of all ...." and the submitter had only to
complete the remainder of the jingle on their entry form. Each
contestant
could only use 50 words or less.
A couple of months later, the woman was surprised when a Carnation Milk
representative came to her door and told her that her entry was the best
one
submitted. However it was unfortunate that the company could not publish
it.
In lieu of that latter fact, they had decided that her entry was worth
at
least a consolation award and provided her with a company check in the
amount of $1,000 for her creativity. Here is her entry:
I like Carnation best of all,
No tits to pull, no shit to haul.
No barns to clean, no hay to pitch,
Just punch a hole in the son of a bitch.