PrincessPratt Posted July 17, 2008 Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 I was talking to one of my guy friends the other night about current dating practices. I've started to question some things. First of all I wonder if chivalry has gone right out the darn window? Or are people really that clueless? Or has the culture of dating changed? I notice that instead of a respectfully calling you to set up a date....he sends a text message. Are men afraid of rejection? Just curious b/c if a female gives you her number I think she may actually pick up that phone to answer. lol. Secondly, if you get a text message at 2 or 3 in the morning does that still constitute a booty call (considering the content of the TM is just...hey how ya doing). Has this become the new culture of dating...even for the 30 plus crowd??? I'm seriously curious as to what men are thinking when they do these things. Type away.....hehe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NinjaNick Posted July 17, 2008 Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 Texting is a way to avoid having to talk in my opinion. To keep it short and to the point. If I want to chill on the phone for a bit then I will call. I'm married though and I hold doors for my wife and not all the time, but sometimes open the car door for her. I don't suggest doing that to a girl you're trying to get with though if you're single and aren't dating because if you're too nice to a female you end up in the friend zone and no man wants to be there when they're single and looking for a girl. Also, YES a 2am text/call IS always for pleasure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2insanezx10r Posted July 17, 2008 Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 When I was dating we did'nt have cell phones to text on. Wow how much easier for denial. I look at my boys texting other girls and wonder what there going to do when they actually have to sit down to talk to them. Good luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NinjaNick Posted July 17, 2008 Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 Oh and yes the dating culture has changed. Plus women have changed from those days. They want a sweet guy but those guys get hugs while the bad boy/attitude takes her to bed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessPratt Posted July 17, 2008 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 I don't suggest doing that to a girl you're trying to get with though if you're single and aren't dating because if you're too nice to a female you end up in the friend zone and no man wants to be there when they're single and looking for a girl. .I think that depends on the girl. I've dated & married enough jack asses to last me a lifetime. People can change. To disprove ur point (and to get u going)....I have a guy friend who is the sweetest thing in the world. I've been good friends with him for 8 years. I NEVER have been attracted to him b/c he was just "too nice". He's seen me through all my traumatized relationships, helped me move several times, and the dude even helped me lay sod when I build my new home years ago. Back then I was thinking oh this is just my brother in Christ. Now I look at him and I see his character and integrity. NOW I am extremely attracted to him b/c of who he is. He never changed. I did. I got sick and tired of getting treated like crap and now my affections are set on the men who will treat me like a princess. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessPratt Posted July 17, 2008 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 When I was dating we did'nt have cell phones to text on. Wow how much easier for denial. I look at my boys texting other girls and wonder what there going to do when they actually have to sit down to talk to them. Good luck.See I would expect that from teenagers BUT these are grown men in their 30's and 40's that I have dated in the past few months. Texting me! Arg. Such a turn off!!! Other women have voiced the same concerns to me. That's why I brought this stuff to the forum b/c I really wanted to know people's motives. To me I would actually like to talk to the person for a bit before the first date to see if I even want to waste my time and gas money. hehe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kawi kid Posted July 17, 2008 Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 dont get me started on the nice guys finish last shit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NinjaNick Posted July 17, 2008 Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 Why would that get me going? That's the way it should be, but girls (not you) don't realize that most of the time. I know way too many girls that married or dated idiots for the longest time and then when they realized how ignorant they've been it's too late, they're tied with that guy forever because they had a kid in one of their sexcapades. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
e-flores Posted July 17, 2008 Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 if you're single and aren't dating because if you're too nice to a female you end up in the friend zone and no man wants to be there when they're single and looking for a girl. i end up doing this every time!!! i feel like i am being a jerk if i dont and then we are just friends.... and im like you have got to be kidding me!!! and secondly i only text girls who are my frinds and not girls i am thinking of dating. i think it is shady and lazy to text a girl that is of importance to you. but i am pretty stuborn when it comes to such things, i know alot of people that just straight up text and never talk to a girl on the phone so maybe its just me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessPratt Posted July 17, 2008 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 Why would that get me going? That's the way it should be, but girls (not you) don't realize that most of the time. I know way too many girls that married or dated idiots for the longest time and then when they realized how ignorant they've been it's too late, they're tied with that guy forever because they had a kid in one of their sexcapades. Because most people can get u going. I luv it! Your posts keep me laughing. You get so heated....and its not always in a bad way. It's good to be passionate about something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NinjaNick Posted July 17, 2008 Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 PP I've never used text to let you know because they didn't have it when I was single..lol. I always called and won them over with laughter and flirting. I agree with you though because them texting you just tells you they don't have enough personality to make conversation with you. So they won't come off as lame/boring to you if they are texting you. Texting is their shield from being vulnerable probably. Just my $.02 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
e-flores Posted July 17, 2008 Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 PP I've never used text to let you know because they didn't have it when I was single..lol. I always called and won them over with laughter and flirting. I agree with you though because them texting you just tells you they don't have enough personality to make conversation with you. So they won't come off as lame/boring to you if they are texting you. Texting is their shield from being vulnerable probably. Just my $.02+100they are being scared and lazy, texting is an easy way out! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessPratt Posted July 17, 2008 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 i think it is shady and lazy to text a girl that is of importance to you. .Amen brotha!!!! That is exactly the reason I hate a text message to set up a first date. It's different to send a tm to say ur gonna be a little late (something no man should EVER b on a first date) but not to set it up. So is a woman not to feel important if she gets a tm from a man that showed great interest initially? Inquiring minds want to know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessPratt Posted July 17, 2008 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 PP I've never used text to let you know because they didn't have it when I was single..lol. I always called and won them over with laughter and flirting. I agree with you though because them texting you just tells you they don't have enough personality to make conversation with you. So they won't come off as lame/boring to you if they are texting you. Texting is their shield from being vulnerable probably. Just my $.02Well I like ur 2cents. lol. It's true. don't men know that a way to a woman's heart is through laughter. Well a way to Sara's heart. hehe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NinjaNick Posted July 17, 2008 Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 I appreciate that comment Sara, some feel different though and don't like my rebuttals, but I've learned to say the hell with them. You can't please everyone and make everyone like you. It's too much work and is impossible. Anyways E-Flores, I learned that when I was like 16. I was wanting females like crazy and after ending up in the friend zone too many times my sexcapades took off HUGE when I would flirt and then give them the cold shoulder. They started chasing me and I loved it. Even if I REALLY liked them a lot I had to put on an act just so I wouldn't end up in the friend zone. It's really stupid that guys have to do that to most girls though to get them interested. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessPratt Posted July 17, 2008 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 Ladies...ur welcome to chime in here with your experiences. Even if you are married. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Disclaimer Posted July 17, 2008 Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 You're too old to date. Just playing. I've never text a girl - period. I don't even have texting. But, it is the age of independence. Most guys either want a girl that'll hold her own or a girl that acts like she NEEDS to have a guy in her life - super dependent. The latter is a turn-off for me, but that's just me.I would agree that texting is a cop out to avoid a convo - but there's numerous reasons - like you said, the guy could be shy or scared of being rejected, or he could have zero conversation skills, or maybe he's too important to communicate on the phone and you should be grateful that he even text you with his busy schedule. At least that's what he wants you to think.That's how things are these days. Why are you waiting for them to come to you? You need to seek out who and what YOU want... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessPratt Posted July 17, 2008 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 Nick u have just engaged in the most carnal sin!!! You put an H on my name! Ekks!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessPratt Posted July 17, 2008 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 Now I do understand the busy thing. A couple years back I dated an attorney that was always in court or mediations. I got probably 10 tm's a day but only maybe a call every other day. We were both busy and that was OK with me. But you had better believe me that b/f he got me he was chasing this gal with many phone calls, etc. etc. Oh and I'm not old!!!! This girls has still got moves you've never seen b/f (a little bit of movie trivia there). You're too old to date. Just playing. I've never text a girl - period. I don't even have texting. But, it is the age of independence. Most guys either want a girl that'll hold her own or a girl that acts like she NEEDS to have a guy in her life - super dependent. The latter is a turn-off for me, but that's just me.I would agree that texting is a cop out to avoid a convo - but there's numerous reasons - like you said, the guy could be shy or scared of being rejected, or he could have zero conversation skills, or maybe he's too important to communicate on the phone and you should be grateful that he even text you with his busy schedule. At least that's what he wants you to think.That's how things are these days. Why are you waiting for them to come to you? You need to seek out who and what YOU want... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NinjaNick Posted July 17, 2008 Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 So is a woman not to feel important if she gets a tm from a man that showed great interest initially? Inquiring minds want to know.I would say more YES than NO, but sometimes the guy that is texting you is too ignorant to know how to communicate to the opposite sex. Also, maybe some that do that are just........dumb. Some guys will NEVER learn how to talk around a woman, to a woman or how to treat a woman. I don't know why, but I think some guys are too stupid to be blessed with the love of a woman. A womans love and presence in a mans life is a true gift that shouldn't be taken advantage of. Those that do take advantage of it end up dying alone and leaving a wonderful woman heartbroken. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NinjaNick Posted July 17, 2008 Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 Nick u have just engaged in the most carnal sin!!! You put an H on my name! Ekks!!!Where? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessPratt Posted July 17, 2008 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 My gosh Nick....where has all this enlightenment come from. I'm really impressed. Do you really feel this way about your wife?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JonS Posted July 17, 2008 Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 Step 1) Meet GirlStep 2) CommunicateStep 3) ???Step 4) Victory Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessPratt Posted July 17, 2008 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 I appreciate that comment SarahHere Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessPratt Posted July 17, 2008 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2008 Pretty slick Nick. You changed it. You know I was just yanking that chain or urs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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