Orion Posted January 19, 2006 Report Share Posted January 19, 2006 Waiting in line recently at my local coffeehouse -- an establishment as renowned for its leisurely service as for its place in Columbus history -- I was blown away by the absolute arrogance of a young woman standing two or three places ahead of me. She had already irritated everyone within earshot by conducting a very animated cell-phone conversation in her singsong, Valley girl, yuppie voice. But now it was her turn to order and the cafe's irritation turned to cold fury as she impatiently waved off the barista to complete her thought (which no doubt required a herculean effort). Alas for young Brie, or whatever her name was, she picked the wrong guy to trifle with. Our barista tossed her out of line and took the next person's order. She huffed off, still tethered to her phone, to our general delight. Today, we consider the mobile phone. More than the personal computer and, now, the iPod, this is the technology that even the most technophobic of cats is likeliest to possess. In other words, they're all over the place. It's understood why people use cell phones. What we're concerned with here is how they use 'em. Too often the answer is "rudely." Yeah, "rude cell-phone user" columns have been done to death over the years. But those columns keep getting written for a reason: There are still far too many of you thoughtless blockheads out there. So let's try it again. Not everyone who uses a mobile phone is as willfully thoughtless as our friend Brie. But the level of rudeness isn't the issue. It's the mere fact of rudeness itself -- that's the issue. Mobile phones have helped to make a crass and vulgar society even more crass and more vulgar. Portability makes it possible for anyone to take a private conversation public and that's never a good idea. In its way, some moron babbling into a mobile phone is as obtrusive and obnoxious as the idiot who plays his boombox at full throttle in the park. Look, the world is not your personal playground. Do not share with us your musical tastes; do not share with us your latest wheelings and dealings. In public places, you have an obligation to hold up your end of the implied social contract by not imposing yourself on those around you. This is crucial to a civilized society and just because technology allows you to act like a braying ass in public doesn't mean you should do it. Quite the contrary, in fact. You need to be more aware of your surroundings than ever. That said, it's understood that you will use your phone away from hermetically sealed rooms and the solitude of your studio apartment. So, please, observe these little niceties: Don't use your phone in obvious situations where your one-sided conversation can only be disruptive: at the movies, at a concert, in a public auditorium, on an elevator, in a crowded waiting room, etc. I would add city buses to the list, but those are already rolling prison yards for the most part. Use your phone if you must, but use at your own peril. If you're in the middle of a face-to-face conversation with someone, don't take a phone call. It's disrespectful. You can go on the theory that if the incoming call is important enough, the caller will leave you a message. You can then return said call at a more convenient moment, and nobody is offended. If you're expecting an important call and somebody stops by to chat you up, let your buddy know that you might have to take a call. That's fair. Ditch the ring tone and put the phone on vibrate. The only person who cares about an incoming call on your phone is you. Don't worry, you'll feel it. (It feels go-o-o-od.) Most ring tones are not only intrusive, they're inane. Don't have emotional phone conversations in my face. In other words, don't break up with your boyfriend publicly. (Besides, we can't see him and being able to see his reaction is half the fun.) Wait until you get home and then toss his sorry ass out the door. Don't talk on the phone while you're grocery shopping. For whatever reason, the acoustics of a shopping aisle seem to amplify your voice. Also, talking on the phone tends to distract you from what's going on in your immediate vicinity and I need to get around you to reach the Cocoa Puffs. When you're at my poker table, turn off your phone and don't use it at all. Personal note to my homies: Using part of a rap song as a voicemail greeting, where the only intelligible words are "bitch" and "fuckah," is not a felicitous way of welcoming an incoming caller. While your friends may find this the height of wit, your employer and professors and parole officer almost certainly will not. Don't buy Nextel. If you must, use it like a phone unless circumstances dictate otherwise. I reserve a special hatred for "git'er dun!" walkie talkie users who force me to listen to unitelligible garble from their "baby's momma" whilst I peruse my local mall. I promise you, you are not that important. A final thought: I kind of like those Bluetooth earpieces where you don't use your hands. The ones that hang from your ear and have you talking off into the ether. You look like a crazy guy wandering down the street, the only difference being that a real crazy guy usually has something interesting to say. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Casper Posted January 19, 2006 Report Share Posted January 19, 2006 tru dat mudda fucka Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AngryBMW Posted January 19, 2006 Report Share Posted January 19, 2006 Bored at work DJ? Oh, I just set you ringer to "Dirt off Your Shoulders" by Jay-Z -Marc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GRN96WS6 Posted January 19, 2006 Report Share Posted January 19, 2006 Agreed! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrs.cos Posted January 19, 2006 Report Share Posted January 19, 2006 I guess i will be the first to admit I am a cell phone addict. But i DO try to be polite. I put it on vibrate when at resturatnts. I WILL NOT answer it in a resturant. I do feel that people are much more rude while they are on their cells. However i do use my cell sometimes while grocery shoping, but when i am doing this, i wear my headset, so that i can look at whats going on around me. I DO agre that women are the worse of the sexes when it comes to this, but i think the ABSOLUTE worse is the guy in a suit, in the BMW 7 series, who cannot afford a headset. oh well. c'est la vie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Pomade Posted January 19, 2006 Report Share Posted January 19, 2006 Waiting in line recently at my local coffeehouse... applause So well written, so informative, and so accurate that - and I am not kidding - I had to remind myself on three different occasions that I was reading it on CR (and not in something like the Times). DJ - please consider submitting this for publication somewhere, anywhere (e.g., the Dispatch). Bravo, muthafucka. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrs.cos Posted January 19, 2006 Report Share Posted January 19, 2006 This is a repost from article. http://www.wired.com/news/columns/0,70041-0.html?tw=wn_tophead_3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skinner Posted January 19, 2006 Report Share Posted January 19, 2006 great post DJ Personally my phone is always on vibrate, always. I also use it in the stores sparingly if i forgot something. the only reason i would take a call while doing anything right now is if the wife calls me. other than that if I'm doing anything with someone else it goes to voice mail. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Pomade Posted January 19, 2006 Report Share Posted January 19, 2006 This is a repost from article. http://www.wired.com/news/columns/0,70041-0.html?tw=wn_tophead_3 Like I said, it seemed professional grade. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orion Posted January 19, 2006 Author Report Share Posted January 19, 2006 um... yeah, sure. i didnt write that. just the nextel part. as an aside, if you had written opinion articles for a fairly well known web publication, would you use your real name? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cgotti Posted January 19, 2006 Report Share Posted January 19, 2006 but i think the ABSOLUTE worse is the guy in a suit, in the BMW 7 series, who cannot afford a headset. More dangerous than the women blabing away on her phone while driving 70mph in a 4000lb. SUV with her kids screaming in the background. I think not. I have been hit by three of already since I have moved to Columbus. I have yet to get hit by a guy in a BMW 7 series. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
03spydr Posted January 19, 2006 Report Share Posted January 19, 2006 poser Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stolen 5.0 Posted January 19, 2006 Report Share Posted January 19, 2006 i usually always take my calls, could be something important, someone in the hospital or such. Isn't that way you have a phone so someone can get ahold of you. I agree with the rudeness part and my ringer is usually off if i'm in the public or I tell the person on the other line to hold if i'm ordering food or such. Why do you have to be a nextel hater better add cingular, alltel, and sprint to you list then Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Karacho1647545492 Posted January 20, 2006 Report Share Posted January 20, 2006 cell phone = electronic lasso people have gotten themselves so wired in that they forget what it is to unplug and enjoy the world. i personally hate the feeling of recognizing my ringer in a quiet room, even if its an appropriate venue to have a phone. this sentiment coming from a guy that lives off the cellular industry is quite moving haha. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Pomade Posted January 20, 2006 Report Share Posted January 20, 2006 cell phone = electronic lasso people have gotten themselves so wired in that they forget what it is to unplug and enjoy the world. I recall reading an article about 10 years ago that predicted the paradox that could result from the advent of all of the advancements in techology: the more "conveniences" we are afforded by technology (e.g., cell phones, TiVo) simply allows us to cram more inconveniences into our life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TurboTank Posted January 20, 2006 Report Share Posted January 20, 2006 i cant wait for one of my customers to two way me when ur around... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kohones Posted January 20, 2006 Report Share Posted January 20, 2006 Very well written & Ohhhhhhhhhhhh so true!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cougar1647545494 Posted January 20, 2006 Report Share Posted January 20, 2006 I promise you, you are not that important. LOLLERZ... So true. Good post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
old dirty bastard Posted January 20, 2006 Report Share Posted January 20, 2006 I traded my cell phone for flippin pigeons years ago I couldnt be happier. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
verse Posted January 20, 2006 Report Share Posted January 20, 2006 More dangerous than the women blabing away on her phone while driving 70mph in a 4000lb. SUV with her kids screaming in the background. I think not. I have been hit by three of already since I have moved to Columbus. I have yet to get hit by a guy in a BMW 7 series. 4000lbs SUV? Your Firebird probably almost weighs 4000lbs. Bigger SUV's weigh almost 6g's. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Pomade Posted January 20, 2006 Report Share Posted January 20, 2006 4000lbs SUV? Your Firebird probably almost weighs 4000lbs. Bigger SUV's weigh almost 6g's. My SUV - a Mitsubishi Montero Limited - weighs about 4700lbs, and it's pretty big. A first generation Hummer might weigh around 6000lbs - the H3's weigh in right around 4500lbs, if I'm not mistaken. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
verse Posted January 20, 2006 Report Share Posted January 20, 2006 My SUV - a Mitsubishi Montero Limited - weighs about 4700lbs, and it's pretty big. A first generation Hummer might weigh around 6000lbs - the H3's weigh in right around 4500lbs, if I'm not mistaken. H3 curb weight - 4700 Suburban curb weight - 5700 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Pomade Posted January 20, 2006 Report Share Posted January 20, 2006 That's believeable - Suburban's are beefy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farkas Posted January 21, 2006 Report Share Posted January 21, 2006 I totally agree with everything written in that article.. especially the nextel users and the idiots who drive and talk on their phones at the same time. I can't even count how many times I have almost been ran off the road by some idiot yappin on the phone while trying to drive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Science Abuse Posted January 21, 2006 Report Share Posted January 21, 2006 More than the personal computer and, now, the iPod, this is the technology that even the most technophobic of cats is likeliest to possess. I must say, thanks to my knuckle dragging, poo flinging technophobia, I still maintain my sense of politeness and dont need those rules to guide me. For some of use, we dont need to be told whats wrong, we know whats wrong because it feels wrong. Personaly I'd feel damn weird carrying on a conversation with my phone in a crouded yet quiet elevator. Who the hell is comfortable with that? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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