dragknee66 Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 I pulled this from some where else.. this is the funniest shit ever! ___________________________ Mattel recently announced the release of limited-edition Barbie Dolls for the Greater Columbus market: http://content.bolt.com/uploads6/photo/1/2/1/5/5/9/3/1215593/medium/1169241241041.jpeg "Dublin Barbie" This princess Barbie is sold only on the square in Dublin. She comes with an assortment of Louis Vuitton Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a expensive long-haired foreign dog named Honey and a mansion. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them. http://content.bolt.com/uploads6/photo/1/2/1/5/5/9/3/1215593/medium/1169241242671.jpeg "Hilliard Barbie" The modern day homemaker comes with a soccer mom minivan, perfect for hiking the tots to and from the house. Includes three Juicy sweatsuits. Financial advisor Ken, cell phone, starbucks cup and inability to drive through traffic without getting winked at not included. http://content.bolt.com/uploads6/photo/1/2/1/5/5/9/3/1215593/medium/1169241243684.jpeg "Westland Barbie" This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife,a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and must be paid for in cash (preferably small, untraceable bills) .unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about. http://content.bolt.com/uploads6/photo/1/2/1/5/5/9/3/1215593/medium/1169241242893.jpeg "New Albany Barbie" This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of Hummer H2 or BMW Z4 Roadster. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country club membership. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with the augmented version. http://content.bolt.com/uploads6/photo/1/2/1/5/5/9/3/1215593/medium/1169241243103.jpeg "Reynoldsburg Barbie" This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free. http://content.bolt.com/uploads6/photo/1/2/1/5/5/9/3/1215593/medium/1169241242403.jpeg "Grove City Barbie" This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out of Grove City Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home. http://content.bolt.com/uploads6/photo/1/2/1/5/5/9/3/1215593/medium/1169241242032.jpeg "Short North Barbie" This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow. She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Grandview Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free. GAY PRIDE!!! http://content.bolt.com/uploads6/photo/1/2/1/5/5/9/3/1215593/medium/1169241240290.jpeg "Inner City Columbus Barbie" This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin R. Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 Spot on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
88lx5oh Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 hilliard barbie isnt so true... my wife and i live in hilliard and is hot and drives a drop top stang Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SPLN SUX Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 Noice! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buck531 Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 Saw that in an email the other week.. Funny chit mang. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheHaze Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 LOL at the short north barbie, it's so true. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dragknee66 Posted January 25, 2007 Author Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 Grove City barbie made me almost spit my food out it was so freakin funny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SpaceGhost Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 Nice Where is "Daville" Barbie? < Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HAOLE Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 I almost fell off my chair! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Pomade Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 "...a Ray Lewis knife..." Those are fucking hilarious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miller Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 Nice Where is "Daville" Barbie? < If they had a Westerville barbie it would be a bunch of blonde/brunettes wearing jeans with white powder on their lips and nose. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trouble Maker Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 That's hilariously.... Columbus/central Ohio has a lot of hillbillies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Mushijobah Posted January 26, 2007 Report Share Posted January 26, 2007 Wheres Bexley? Might have laughed..Otherwise, very good post! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BuckeyeGT Posted January 26, 2007 Report Share Posted January 26, 2007 jewish bexley barbie needed. it should come w/ a set of life size earplugs for the purchaser. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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