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Passing Lane ... no not the forum section


sol740

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Due to a recent thread I have discovered that some of the very people among us, are a bunch of knob-gobbling, douchebags, roaming the earth trying to find more cocks to stuff into their mouths. Due to their neverending search for more penii, they may go slow in the far left lane. Otherwise known as "The Passing Lane", to people without cocks stuffed precariously into all orifices, at all times.

 

While most of us drive with at least a small shred of decency while on the road, and will yield to other drivers that choose to drive faster than us, there seem to be a large group of people, made up of mostly men with very small penii, and or with many cocks inserted into them. Scientists aren't sure what irritates the "non-yielder" or "knob-gobbling faggots" more, the miniscule size of their packages, or the discomfort of being so thoroughly packed with cocks of all shape and size. Despite this possible discomfort, "non-yielders" seem to have a near insatiable appetite for both cocks, and man-juices of near limitless quantities.

 

When interviewed face-to-face to try and gaze into this dark, and disturbing world, the interviewee often devolves the conversation within a matter of moments, leaving little room for a proper analysis. For example ...

 

Interviewer: "Sir, we saw you back there basically blocking the flow of traffic, as others gathered behind you in awe of your stupidity. What were you thinking ?"

 

Knob-Gobbler: "Ya, so what ? The speed limit says 65, so why do I have to move, just go around me ? Thats what I'm thinking ... Psssssh ... the nerve, asking ME to move ... ME !"

 

I: "Sir, you do realize that blocking the flow of traffic, and forcing others to pass you on the right is dangerous to every other motorist on the freeway around you ?"

 

K-G: "SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH AND STUFF MY ASSHOLE WITH YOUR COCK AND BALLS !!!"

 

Discuss amongst yourselves.

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I see two reasons why people do this.

 

1. They're small people with no control over their lives. So blocking traffic is the only way they can get any control. Making someone else miserable is their way of making themselves happy. NOTE: These are the same people that you catch up to while on cruise control, and when you pass them on the left they speed up to pace you right off your fucking quarter panel.

 

2. They're just plain stupid. They're moronic, idiotic wastes of flesh that have no consideration for others on the road.

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I have this conversation every other day..

 

Pass then move over, repeat as necessary. Nothing gets me more frustrated then getting stuck behind some asshole TRYING to pass the cockmunch doing 65.165.

Then he see's you back there and slows to nearly 65 to make it that much more aggrivating.

 

Mini-Guns should be LEGAL on cars just for this reason.

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These fucking people piss me off to no end. When driving my truck I could really care less if I cause an accident. I tailgate them extremely close, then when they don't move I pass them and cut them off as close as I can. Depending on how I'm feeling that day brake checking may occur.

 

Hence why I love racing and hate driving.

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I've really just moved on to passing on the right.

 

Safely, with signals, and not flying by or anything....but I don't put up the two car block anymore.

 

The ultimate right lane pass is by timing a "straight through" offramp light correctly so that you get off and get right back on, ahead of the faggots blocking both lanes :). Diley road exit on 33 is a classic for such a maneuver.

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I have fog lights behind my grill in the jeep.

 

they are hot they are bright and they are in yo motha fukin rear view mirror.

 

For idiots driving slow or cutting me off

 

OOoOOoOohhhh great idea. I have also thought about putting a train horn for hornblasters in my Jeep. Lights+train horn=EPIC win.

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I just want it to be legal to mounts bars on the front of my car and have the green light to "bump draft" them forward to help them along until I can get around them. I mean there are many cars on the road with less HP than me, so I want to spread around the HP wealth. I just want to do my part for my fellow citizens. I understand if your civic can't see 70MPH because of drag, I will be there to help. :)
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step #1 - Use the berm and pepper their car with stones n shit. Step #2 - Go into the right lane, slow down, move back into the left lane behind them again. Repeat step 1 another 3 times, or until they skid like a mental off the rode.
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I just want it to be legal to mounts bars on the front of my car and have the green light to "bump draft" them forward to help them along until I can get around them. I mean there are many cars on the road with less HP than me, so I want to spread around the HP wealth. I just want to do my part for my fellow citizens. I understand if your civic can't see 70MPH because of drag, I will be there to help. :)

 

We can see 70MPH it just takes some time to get there,a long with some octane boosters and prayers.

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I see this shit every day and I wish I had the Green light to bump them. Today I was passing in the passing lane and just starting to pass a pack of cars and the middle car (mid 90's V6 Mustang) cuts over without a turn signal making my brake and slow down 10 mph and he just sits there ever so slowly moving a ahead while there is absolutely no one behind me. I give him the the chance to speed up then I ride up on his ass until he is three cars ahead of the car in the right lane since I was in the truck. I signal and start to get over to pass on the right, then he jumps back over into the right lane, I gun it and pass him on the left. Sure enough, a punk kid with the phone to his ear. It make me love my truck when they do it at night, see them squirm to adjust their mirror because of the headlights up there ass, instead of getting out of the fucking way. Get a fucking clue!!!!
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This is definitely my number one pet peeve. What pisses me off more is those f*ckers who mad dash to the left lane from the on-ramp, just because they seem to think they MUST be there in their minivan doing 55mph. Better yet are the morons who will eventually move over when I'm behind them waiting to get back up to the speed limit in the passing lane, and then immediately move back over; like I interrupted their day.

 

I need a sticker on my window that says, "I hate 99% of you."

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