Alex L. Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 (edited) There has been some concern and speculation lately about the condition of DERP Enterprises for the 2010 fiscal year. Some say we have reached a plateau, while others say we are going nowhere but up. I feel as though we are running around in circles and trying to place the blame on each other, while in reality we should be banding together and creating and putting a plan of action for the next decade into action. As DERP Enterprises head of Mongolian operations, I have created this thread for the people who are the foundation of DERP to come together and discuss DERP. Where is DERP going? How can we keep DERP from drifting towards a negative slope? Where will DERP be in the years to come? For the investors: Here is a graph of our revenue for 2009: http://na.iiaa.org/IN&V/011708/small-business-graph.gif As you can see, DERP's revenue less than $100k was 21% worse (30% better, 51% worse) compared to the $100k-$500k revenue slot, where there was only 43% worse compared to the 33% better. Both the $100k and $100k-$500k brackets represent 33% of the company's interest. Conversely, the $1-$5million portion of our revenue actually had 24% better (51% better compared to 27% worse) along with our $5mil. and over bracket which experienced an 11% overall bettering (46% better, 35% worse). As you can tell from these figures, DERP is going up, and going up in a big way. In closing, I would like to present this flow chart to you all: http://www.dprudder.com/Home_files/Str_Mkt_Business_Chart.png The circular shape of this graph is a metaphor for how DERP's development has and always will work. Our in-house market research feeds into operational planning, which goes directly into consumer research, which then goes back into our market research. What does this mean for you? DERP is going places. DERP is going to great places. We at DERP would like to include you in on this upward progression. I hope this has provided you with a better explanation of what DERP is, and where DERP is headed. Yours in love, trust, and brotherhood, Horatio Sheeba DERP Enterprises CO.INC. Head of Mongolian Operations http://yourgen.com/temp-images/1/141/comic-beware-125384171862004.gif Edited September 25, 2009 by Alex L. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wnaplay1647545503 Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 I dont believe I ever seen this horatios oven thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bigbird Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 http://i79.photobucket.com/albums/j160/drevol500/derp.jpg http://i79.photobucket.com/albums/j160/drevol500/derp-derp-dog.jpg Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckeye1647545503 Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 I want my click back Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Jones Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 As DERP's VP Of Enviromental Services, I can promise that the the utmost care is being put into our 2010/2011 enviromental protection plan. Our new Dearborn plant is being build with a renewable energy subsystem, and a return to grid solar array. At DERP we are commited to providing our investors, and mother earth with the best possible growth going forward. Do let me know if you have any questions, Führer Von Otrich, VP Of Enviromental Services DERP Enterprises. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokin5s Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 I want my click back +1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex L. Posted September 25, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 Please, let us keep the useless banter down so we can discuss DERP. This is only for the betterment of not just our nation, but the world as a whole. As you can see by the vast network of international associates that we are beginning to possess, DERP is expanding it's horizons to encompass a broad spectrum of worldly people into the corporation. DERP: Not just for the country; for the world. Yours in love, trust, and brotherhood, Horatio Sheeba DERP Enterprises CO.INC. Head of Mongolian Operations Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patrick Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 Here at DERP Canada: Pinapples are growing, maple syrup flowing. Money is being made, and the action plan of fighting global cooling is in full effect. Maurice Richard out. DERP Canada Head of Canadian Operations Overseer of Pineapple Production and Maple Syrup Harvesting Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex L. Posted September 25, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 Our environmental causes are vast and defined, just as our industrious endeavors. Whatever you need, DERP is there to deliver. Yours in love, trust, and brotherhood, Horatio Sheeba DERP Enterprises CO.INC. Head of Mongolian Operations Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wnaplay1647545503 Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 I am saddened that an enterprise such as "derp" would allow its members to openly discuss what clearly are trade secrets on an open forum. Tisk tisk Harden Thick aka Jack Knoff aka Harry Dick Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex L. Posted September 25, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 These are not trade secrets, rather innovative ideas we are sharing with potential investors, employees, and correspondents alike. DERP: Here for you, your country, the world. Yours in love, trust, and brotherhood, Horatio Sheeba DERP Enterprises CO.INC. Head of Mongolian Operations Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patrick Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 Stock has continually gone up when announcements/discussions such as these are made. Maurice Richard out. DERP Canada Head of Canadian Operations Overseer of Pineapple Production and Maple Syrup Harvesting Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cordell Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 Deuchebags Envious of Retarded Pussys This would be a few steps below retarded pussys. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Squidward Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 As CEO of DERP enterprises, it is my job to unify all the corperate centers across the world and to inform the public of all growth and future plans for DERP. Current growth rates are climbing at a staggering rate and we plan to expand in the near future. Although are products are becoming more ecologically friendly, we still have huge steps to make in order to release in the United States. While functioning perfectly in Mongolia and Canada our U.S. program is on the rise. We plan to release not only our well know DERP products but also a brand new product new for the U.S. release. While we can not release ant specifications or information on our new product at this time, we garentee that it will be on par with our current products' quality and function with up to 20% more efficient. Dirk Fergouson DERP Enterprises CO.INC. CEO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wnaplay1647545503 Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 As CEO of DERP enterprises, it is my job to unify all the corperate centers across the world and to inform the public of all growth and future plans for DERP. Dirk Fergouson DERP Enterprises CO.INC. CEO Enuff said. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex L. Posted September 25, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 There you hear it, straight from the CEO's cocksucker. However, not only will we be functioning at a 20% greater efficiency, we will be seeing at least a 40% spike in productivity. Mr. Richard will concur. Horatio Sheeba DERP Enterprises CO.INC. Head of Mongolian Operations Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cordell Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 http://i405.photobucket.com/albums/pp133/ND2RACE/dumb/derp.jpg Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Squidward Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 http://i405.photobucket.com/albums/pp133/ND2RACE/dumb/derp.jpg yet were not the ones looking up dildos just to make a post to make fun of someone Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex L. Posted September 25, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 Dirk, stay civil. We are trying to run a business here, not munch on smoked horsecock. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cordell Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 yet were not the ones looking up dildos just to make a post to make fun of someone Can't I be Derp head of advertizing? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex L. Posted September 25, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 What are your credentials? Thanks, e-ROK Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wnaplay1647545503 Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 This thread just made my balls itch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tripleskate Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 This is the most active thread on CR, for shame. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex L. Posted September 25, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 This thread just made my balls itch. DERP will scratch them, spray them with our patented DERP ball cleaner, and package them neatly. Try to get that kind of treatment from those FedEx/UPS bitches. Thanks, Airick Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cordell Posted September 25, 2009 Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 What are your credentials? Thanks, e-ROK I'm 1/100000000000000th mongolian, and a direct decendent of the REAL Sheeba. I guess I out qualify you as biggest Derp head retard. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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