Weds was a great day....

[cinergi]

And I will always remember it fondly.

 

I got rid of thee cursed Audi.

 

No more VAG for me!!

[Rustlestiltskin]

I never bought any of that "size matters" crap until my junior year in college. I lived in the dorms with two roommates, David and John. David was a pretty ordinary looking guy, kinda quiet - but John was tall, lean, muscular and (according to him anyway) was hung like a bull. He used to joke about it a lot - even around my girlfriend, Amy. Amy was a sophomore and was petite, shy and somewhat quiet. I didn't like it when John would make his "big dick" comments and jokes around Amy, but she told me she didn't pay any attention to him and truth be told, she really couldn't stand John.

 

I have a 5.5" dick and with Amy being so petite, it always seemed to do the trick. I was only the third guy she'd ever been with and only her second boyfriend - maybe my guard was just down but who knows.

 

Anyway, one Friday night, Amy and I were hanging out in my dorm room drinking, smoking some weed and watching TV. David and John had both gone home for the weekend - or so we thought. At about 1AM (Amy and I were pretty toasted by then), John walked in. He'd ended up hanging out with some of his friends off campus and had decided to just drive home in the morning since his parents only lived about an hour and a half away.

 

He could see that Amy and I were both pretty hammered. He grabbed a beer and sat down and we smoked somem more weed with him. Amy was pretty drunk and started giving John ****. John seemed to get a kick out of it and I could see him kinda flirting with Amy. Then I noticed (and hoped that Amy wouldn't) that John wasn't wearing any underwear.

 

But Amy started massaging my dick through my jeans and being so ****ed up, I just laid my head back and enjoyed it - I couldn't believe she was doing that right in front of John! I heard John get up to pass Amy the joint we were smoking and I heard her gasp, long and deep and she suddenly stopped stroking my dick. I opened my eyes and saw John standing righ tin front of Amy with a HUGE ****ing bulge in his pants - just inches from her face. The room was so quiet you could have heard a pin drop.

 

He just stood there and I could feel her hand tremble and hear her breathing quicken. when she slowly looked up at him, almost in awe and respect, I could feel my heart start to pound in my chest. Then she softly whispered "ohhhhhhhhhhh" as she gingerly reached up to brush her finger tips across that massive knot in his pants. When she touched it, it throbbed - **** I could see it throb thorugh his pants - Amy just gasped again and looked up at him.

 

"What?" John asked her and just kinda laughed. Amy did NOT laugh. Instead, she softly asked "can i see it?" John stopped laughing, looked at her very seriously and told her to take it out. Amy never even hesitated - or looked back at me for an "OK" - just just obeyed him and began to open his jeans. I coudl see her nipples rock hard under her t-shirt and I could tell she was practically panting.

 

She opened his jeans and his big thick dick just fell out...and he had NOT been kidding. That cock was strong, thick, heavy and muscular. The head was a big purple mushroom that sat on top of the thickest shaft i'd ever seen. He was semi-hard and was HUGE compared to me. Amy just gasped and kept whispering "ohmygod..ohmygod...ohmygod". When she wrapped her hand around it, her brow just knotted in disbelief and she almost laughed at how thick he was - her fingers couldn't even touch.

 

John just stood there watching my girlfriend worship his magnificent cock. Slowly shaking her head in disbelief, she two-fisted him - one hand next to the other...and there was STILL a few inches left - and he was getting rock hard, too.

 

Amy smiled and patted the couch next to her and John sat down, his cock standing straight up. Honestly he had to be almost 10" (judging from the size of Amy's hand). I opened my pants and took my own cock out. Amy took my cock in her left hand and John's in her right - but there was little doubt whose cock was getting more attention. She couldn't take her eyes off his cock and her hand only occasionally stroked my dick...but John's she pumped with long, purposeful strokes until she finally couldn't help herself any longer and knelt in front of him, kissing his cock and rubbing it against her soft pale skin.

 

She sucked his dick until SHE came - just from sucking him! I stroked the whole time until he pulled her toward him, peeled off her pants (she didnt even make the slightest attempt to stop him) and sat her on his lap, her back to his chest - the two of them right next to me. She just rolled her head back to kiss him as he squeezed her tits through her shirt. Her hands went down and pushed that big cock against her pussy and she groaned so loud when it touched her that I thought people outside would hear.

 

John's dick was so ****ing big that he easily penetrated her from behind with her sitting on his lap. She arched up so she could take as much of it as she could and they started to **** right there next to me. It shocked me how easily her petite little body accomodated that horse cock of his. John pounded her in positions that i physically CANNOT do for over an hour - I have no idea how many times she came - she was even in tears a few times (though she never once told him to stop).

 

He asked her if she was on the pill and when she said she was on the patch, he told her that he was going to cum inside of her to mark her - which only made her cum again! when he finally came, he had Amy on her back, her legs shaking violently as they both came together - and true to his word, John dumped his seed deep up inside my girlfriend's pussy right in front of me. But **** - he didn't even lose his damn hard on! They ****ed for about another 40 minutes and he came twice more. Amy was a wreck by the time we all went to bed.

 

I will never forget the look on her face - like she was afraid of him and in love with him all at once - the whole time they ****ed. She later told me that there were no words to describe it - it was incredible but even that didn't seem enough. To my knowledge they never ****ed again and Amy and I dated for about another year before we finally broke up. I always wondered if she ended up with him or some other big dick guy.

 

But one thing I know for sure - she NEVER ****ed me like she did John and the things she said about John - the way she looked at him - and the way she was around him after that night (almost shy and meek) convinced me that a big dick makes a difference.

 

Amy told me that she "HAD to respect him" even if she didn't like him...and that she almost felt like he "had a right to her". So there ya go.

Edited November 12, 2010 by Rustlestiltskin

[staywide8]

Wtf

[AWW$HEEET]

LOL QUE?

[Patterson]

I could see his point.

[2 Sweet]

wow.....

[cinergi]

http://i35.photobucket.com/albums/d172/cinergi/IMG_1400.jpg

[Sam1647545489]

It all started when our hyphen-happy protagonist, Anthony, woke up in a imaginery desert. It was the second time it had happened. Feeling barely puzzled, Anthony stroked a dangerous oil-soaked rag, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). Before anyone could take off their pants, he realized that his beloved penis was missing! Immediately he called his former lay, Brian. Anthony had known Brian for (plus or minus) 550,000 years, the majority of which were enticing ones. Brian was unique. He was congenial though sometimes a little... oafish. Anthony called him anyway, for the situation was urgent.

 

Brian picked up to a very ecstatic Anthony. Brian calmly assured him that most 3-legged wallabies shudder before mating, yet South American hissing sloths usually scandalously grimace *after* mating. He had no idea what that meant; he was only concerned with distracting Anthony. Why was Brian trying to distract Anthony? Because he had snuck out from Anthony's with the penis only five days prior. It was a enticing little penis... how could he resist?

 

It didn't take long before Anthony got back to the subject at hand: his penis. Brian panicked. Relunctantly, Brian invited him over, assuring him they'd find the penis. Anthony grabbed his time machine and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Brian realized that he was in trouble. He had to find a place to hide the penis and he had to do it aimlessly. He figured that if Anthony took the curb-jumping ghetto sled (Impala), he had take at least five minutes before Anthony would get there. But if he took the Trans am? Then Brian would be ridiculously screwed.

 

Before he could come up with any reasonable ideas, Brian was interrupted by eight dimwitted dogs that were lured by his penis. Brian sneezed; 'Not again', he thought. Feeling puzzled, he skillfully reached for his dull pencil and thoughtfully attacked every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent--the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the haunted thicket, squealing with discontent. He exhaled with relief. That's when he heard the Trans am rolling up. It was Anthony.

 

----o0o----

 

As he pulled up, he felt a sense of urgency. He had had to make an unscheduled stop at Wal-Mart to pick up a 12-pack of dull pencils, so he knew he was running late. With a careful leap, Anthony was out of the Trans am and went wildly jaunting toward Brian's front door. Meanwhile inside, Brian was panicking. Not thinking, he tossed the penis into a box of potatos and then slid the box behind his giraffe. Brian was stunned but at least the penis was concealed. The doorbell rang.

 

'Come in,' Brian exotically purred. With a careful push, Anthony opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some oafish noble genius in a pimp fresh, candy-painted 'Lac,' he lied. 'It's fine,' Brian assured him. Anthony took a seat RIGHT next to where Brian had hidden the penis. Brian grimaced trying unsuccessfully to hide his nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' he blurted. But Anthony was distracted. In a blinding moment of misguided bravado, Brian noticed a clueless look on Anthony's face. Anthony slowly opened his mouth to speak.

 

'...What's that smell?'

 

Brian felt a stabbing pain in his prostate when Anthony asked this. In a moment of disbelief, he realized that he had hidden the penis right by his oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A oafish look started to form on Anthony's face. He turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's carrots from when she used to have pet albino cats. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Anthony nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before Brian could react, Anthony deftly lunged toward the box and opened it. The penis was plainly in view.

 

Anthony stared at Brian for what what must've been two microseconds. Before anyone could take off their pants, Brian groped surreptitiously in Anthony's direction, clearly desperate. Anthony grabbed the penis and bolted for the door. It was locked. Brian let out a curious chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Anthony,' he rebuked. Brian always had been a little abrasive, so Anthony knew that reconciliation was not an option; he needed to escape before Brian did something crazy, like... start chucking dangerous oil-soaked rags at him or something. A few freaknasty minutes later, he gripped his penis tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels.

 

Brian looked on, blankly. 'What the hell? That seemed excessive. The other door was open, you know.' Silence from Anthony. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame four days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly he felt a tinge of concern for Anthony. 'Oh. You ..okay?' Still silence. Brian walked over to the window and looked down. Anthony was gone.

 

----o0o----

 

Just yonder, Anthony was struggling to make his way through the imaginery desert behind Brian's place. Anthony had severely hurt his taint during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral dogs suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the penis. One by one they latched on to Anthony. Already weakened from his injury, Anthony yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of dogs running off with his penis.

 

About six hours later, Anthony awoke, his shin throbbing. It was dark and Anthony did not know where he was. Deep in the arid imaginery desert, Anthony was abnormally lost. Suddenly cheered up by the Hamtaro theme song, he remembered that his penis was taken by the dogs. But at that point, he was just thankful for his life. That's when, to his horror, a oversized dog emerged from the magical cornfield. It was the alpha dog. Anthony opened his mouth to scream but was cut short when the dog sunk its teeth into Anthony's love handle. With a faint groan, the life escaped from Anthony's lungs, but not before he realized that he was a failure.

 

Less than eleven miles away, Brian was entombed by anguish over the loss of the penis. 'MY PRECIOUS!!' he cried, as he reached for a sharpened ninja star. With a careful thrust, he buried it deeply into his shin. As the room began to fade to black, he thought about Anthony... wishing he had found the courage to tell him that he loved him. But he would die alone that day. All that remained was the penis that had turned them against each other, ultimately causing their demise. And as the dew on melancholy sappling branches began to reflect the dawn's reddish glare, all that could be heard was the chilling cry of distant dogs, desecrating all things sacred to virtuous men, and perpetuating an evil that would reign for centuries to come. Our heroes would've lived unhappily ever after, but they were too busy being dead. So, no one lived forever after, the end. :'(