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Any of you Teufulhunden on deck ever....


krzwhtman
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As a diesel mech sometimes we would take .50 cal shells and pull the bullet off and put a bunch of powder underneath someone when they were working on a truck (never on fuel systems duh), distract them somehow and have someone light the powder when they weren't looking.

Good laughs.

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In the desert we had a little ford ranger pick up truck that out gunny would roll around in- one day we removed the hinges that held the door on and put it back in place. We all got our asses chewed for that shit but the look on his face when his door fell off was priceless.

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lol ... i could picture that , sorta like the time we greased a butter bars car handles . he was a boot , and a very disrespectful to EVERYONE bellow him boot. was sorta suggested we handle this ... was in Yuma Arizona at the time. was hilarious.ohh and it was inside and outside.

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Another quick one we parked a DTC 4000 FL infront of a Porta John after a Lance Coolie went in it. pinned between a fence and the forklift he couldnt get out. made a VERY SMALL mre bomb. was sent down the vent pipe .... he seen it as it hit , was halfway out the bent top of the door when it boomed.

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mre heater + small amount of water + small soda bottle

lil water + couple tablespoons of heater + taped gatoraide bottle lid = biggest boom , old heater was better than new one , they redesigned em to stop MRE fraggings in field. you used to get alot bigger boom.

was a boredom tool.

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More of an unintentional joke.

So we're on patrol and I see a tarantula sitting on a dead bird. Ooohhhhh. Nice find right? So I pull off a flight glove and scoop up said prize and put it in a pouch. So a while later were all huddled together in a defelade and I want to check out my prize. So as I pull out the glove the cuff unrolls and this angry beast comes flying out. It just happens to land on Sgt. Ali who starts to freak out like I've never seen a man do. He prolly wouldve screamed if he couldve caught his breath. Sgt. Ali was about 5'3 of Indian dude from the Bronx. And as we all found out that day has been deathly afraid of spiders ALL HIS LIFE.

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I have one that's a little long winded. During a training exercise (CAX) in 29 Palms on August, we had this guy from our poweline division of the squadron that was, well, part of that 10%. He liked to wander off and take naps, but he didn't like to shower. One of his favorite places to nap was the port-a-johns outside the hangar area at night. Not sure exactly why other than no one ever used them unless ablsolutey necessary. Well, after a couple weeks of him smelling foul and being lazy, his shop mates found him asleep in one of the johns. So the strapped the door shut with a tie down. We discovered long before this that a 20 oz Gatorade bottle fits down the vent tube of the john. It also makes a nice MRE bomb. So they loaded one up, dropped it down the vent. While the thunk of it wasn't enough to roust him out of the box, the sudden burst and splash of blue shit in the tank did, which of course motivated him to exit. Too bad the door was strapped shut. He didn't make his way out, but did manage to tip the box over (with a little help, but trust me...he did most of the work himself). Once it was propped back up and the door unstrapped, he burst out to kick the ass of whomever he first caem across. That person just happened to be his SNCOIC. While those involved did have to take a couple extra turns at plane wash that det, the young jarhead learned his lesson about laziness and hygene.

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I had a cpl. in my platoon who liked to take a crap in people foxhole's. Also sending boots all over the base looking for stupid shit like tire stretchers.

We had some guys that liked to send noobs out to get 10,000 feet of flightline or a 5 gallon can of pneumatic lubricant. Then there is the obligatory errand to have them get ID10T forms from S-4.

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We had some guys that liked to send noobs out to get 10,000 feet of flightline or a 5 gallon can of pneumatic lubricant. Then there is the obligatory errand to have them get ID10T forms from S-4.

sent a green Marine looking for the ID 10 T form , wrote it down for him and all , got calls from HQ , supply, sickbay, ordinance, and Black Sheep Squadron.... EVERYONE told him they ran out look here. i only sent him to supply.

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We had some guys that liked to send noobs out to get 10,000 feet of flightline or a 5 gallon can of pneumatic lubricant. Then there is the obligatory errand to have them get ID10T forms from S-4.

Dont forget about sending them for prop wash

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i was with MWSS371 H.E in yuma for a few years (HATED THE WING) but we had a few engineers tests. one was the old place a quarter on a solid peice of wood, give the Marine a Axe and blindfold them. offer to hold his cover and blouse so he doesnt mess em all up . spin him around a few times and tell him he cant split the quarter, if he does a day off. well as he spins place the cover over the quarter.

we also took the tymco runway sweeper and would fill the back hopper with water. Park it behind the Maintenance Bay and shut it off leaving the Pony motor running that opened the hopper. it would leak water a little , but if anyone asked it was washed recently. we would then send a Marine under it to bleed the brakes , well we got two new Marines in the same day. Day two of them in the fleet we do the sweeped test. they both slide under and we hand em the 3/8 s wrench , BUT before they crack the bleeder we would open the hopper. well with it being the DESERT there are flash flood signs everywhere. one Marine came out from under the truck so fast as the 300 gallons of water rushed over him, ran smack into a pole that was just port aft of the truck, Spun only like id ever seen from NFL running backs..... and didnt stop running till about 300 feet away ........ was hilarious. at same time other Marine comes out instantly wanting to fight. was a blast.

Edited by krzwhtman
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Not a fleet story but still kind of funny. After I got out and was back home I was working in a machine shop. One summer I went out to Cali to visit some high school friends who were still in. One was in Fallbrook and the other was a recruiter in Redondo Beach. We went to TJ to do what ever you do there and I brought back some M80s. They were a pale red color, almost pink. I was setting them off inside the shop scarring the shit out of people for days. You could feel the compression from them all over the shop. We had this one shitbird that would go to the shitter to take a nap everyday at the same time. I took a white terrycloth rag cut it up, rolled it up, cut a fuse off of one of the M80s, used a red magic marker to color it and it looked just like the real thing. I lit it threw it into his stall and I hear "Tod you fucking asshole" as he is standing up turning sideways trying to lift his leg up to protect his package. His pants down at his ankles don't allow this type of movement and he falls on the floor naked from the waist down holding his ears.

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Not a fleet story but still kind of funny. After I got out and was back home I was working in a machine shop. One summer I went out to Cali to visit some high school friends who were still in. One was in Fallbrook and the other was a recruiter in Redondo Beach. We went to TJ to do what ever you do there and I brought back some M80s. They were a pale red color, almost pink. I was setting them off inside the shop scarring the shit out of people for days. You could feel the compression from them all over the shop. We had this one shitbird that would go to the shitter to take a nap everyday at the same time. I took a white terrycloth rag cut it up, rolled it up, cut a fuse off of one of the M80s, used a red magic marker to color it and it looked just like the real thing. I lit it threw it into his stall and I hear "Tod you fucking asshole" as he is standing up turning sideways trying to lift his leg up to protect his package. His pants down at his ankles don't allow this type of movement and he falls on the floor naked from the waist down holding his ears.

:lol:

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