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Short joke


Guest Hal

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A fleeing Taliban, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghan desert when he saw something far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he hurried toward the oasis, only to find a little old Jewish man at a small stand, selling ties...

 

The Taliban asked, "Do you have water?"

 

The Jewish man replied, "I have no water. Would you like to buy a tie? They are only $5."

 

The Taliban shouted, "You Idiot! I do not need an over-priced tie.. I need water! I should kill you, but I must find water first!"

 

"OK," said the little old Jewish man, "It does not matter that you do not want to buy a tie and that you hate me. I will show you that I am bigger than that. If you continue over that hill to the east for about two miles, you will find a lovely restaurant. It has all the ice cold water you need. Shalom."

 

Cursing, the Taliban staggered away over the hill.

 

Several hours later, he staggered back, almost dead, and said:

 

"You little prick, your brother won't let me in without a tie.....":dumb:

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I'll see if I can do any better:

 

A man is stopped by the police around 1 AM and is asked where he was going at this late hour.

 

The man replies, "I am going to attend a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body and social relations".

 

The officer then asks, "Really? Who on earth is giving such a lecture at this time of night?"

 

The man replies simply, "My wife." :gabe:

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Once there was a guy who asked a girl to marry him

 

she said no

 

He spent the rest of his life in peace with cars, motorcycles, big tv's, beer and video games happily ever after.

 

Hahahahahaha.

 

Well played Sir.

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A flight attendant gets on the airplane's PA system to address the passengers. "Welcome to San Francisco and we appreciate you flying with us today!"

 

"Our apologies for the bumpy landing. It wasn't the Captain's fault..."

 

"...and it wasn't the co-pilot's fault."

 

"It was the asphalt."

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A flight attendant gets on the airplane's PA system to address the passengers. "Welcome to San Francisco and we appreciate you flying with us today!"

 

"Our apologies for the bumpy landing. It wasn't the Captain's fault..."

 

"...and it wasn't the co-pilot's fault."

 

"It was the asphalt."

 

:lolguy:

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