Tractor Posted December 5, 2013 Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 I figured I'd consult CR's e-therapists about some drama in my life. I won't go into the whole long history in detail, I'll just say that my wife's family is wrought with mental illness, mostly undiagnosed, and untreated, several where diagnosed, and several suicides have occurred including her own mother. Her child hood was a breeding ground for disorders and I believe that she suffers from borderline personality disorder or something similar. We've been married for +12 years and things have always been a bit off and not what I expected at all. From my research I've found that is a very common saying among spouses. Just recently after an episode I got back into researching and finally found a disorder that fits as almost a textbook case. Anyone else deal with this illness personally? I would love a recommendation of somewhere she could get real help. Anyone who knows about this condition knows that their reality is very distorted and you have almost no hope of reasoning with them when they are on a rampage and very little when they aren't and that they try to drag you into their reality constantly to justify their position so its very maddening for loved ones. I don't plan on leaving her anytime soon, but realize that is always an option. I love her and would rather stand by her and work through it. I got time lol. Not many of you have met her on here, she has come to meets in the distant past though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrs.cos Posted December 5, 2013 Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 Does she realize she has an issue? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tractor Posted December 5, 2013 Author Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 Does she realize she has an issue? She has always known she has a lot of problems with her self image and other things, since both her parents were messed up they let a very controlling, man hating aunt take care of her a lot when she was a baby which turned into a life long problem of her controlling her and putting her down as a method of her control. The aunt also lives with a female "friend", but no ones quite sure if she doesn't just control her too or if they are lesbians. Lol its all so messed up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KillJoy Posted December 5, 2013 Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 Paging Dr. John. :thumbup: KillJoy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cordell Posted December 5, 2013 Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 I figured I'd consult CR's e-therapists about some drama in my life. I won't go into the whole long history in detail, I'll just say that my wife's family is wrought with mental illness, mostly undiagnosed, and untreated, several where diagnosed, and several suicides have occurred including her own mother. Her child hood was a breeding ground for disorders and I believe that she suffers from borderline personality disorder or something similar. We've been married for +12 years and things have always been a bit off and not what I expected at all. From my research I've found that is a very common saying among spouses. Just recently after an episode I got back into researching and finally found a disorder that fits as almost a textbook case. Anyone else deal with this illness personally? I would love a recommendation of somewhere she could get real help. Anyone who knows about this condition knows that their reality is very distorted and you have almost no hope of reasoning with them when they are on a rampage and very little when they aren't and that they try to drag you into their reality constantly to justify their position so its very maddening for loved ones. I don't plan on leaving her anytime soon, but realize that is always an option. I love her and would rather stand by her and work through it. I got time lol. Not many of you have met her on here, she has come to meets in the distant past though. This sounds familiar, but it was my wife dealing with me not the other way around. I don't know the severity of your wife, or what she would be willing to do, but after many fucked up events in my early to mid 20s my wife pushed for me to get some help and I did some counseling. Helped me a lot, your wife may need more then that, but simple counseling would be a great place to start. Someone like that would at least get you pointed in the right direction. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tractor Posted December 5, 2013 Author Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 I've never known her to do any of the self harming stuff that suffers tend to do, she might have more than normal, extreme sensitivity to criticism and also idealizes her "world" and then finds fault with everyone else, but herself about why she can't be happy and can't have relationships very easily and pushes everyone away due to wanting them to agree with her and be on her side against the ones she is going off on at the moment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrs.cos Posted December 5, 2013 Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 So... has she been to a Phsycologist and tried medicines that are made to deal with these issues? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cordell Posted December 5, 2013 Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 So... has she been to a Phsycologist and tried medicines that are made to deal with these issues? Medicines have their place, but going to a doctor and trying some is no place to start. Besides a psychologist typically doesn't prescribe medicine, a psychiatrist does that. Pretty good difference between the two professionals. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
copperhead Posted December 5, 2013 Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 Damn, I didn't know things were this bad. We need to find some time to hang out, just us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Not Brian Posted December 5, 2013 Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 Sounds like a normal woman to me... either that or maybe Asberger syndrome (my brother's wife mildly has it and she's fucking insane) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
copperhead Posted December 5, 2013 Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 Sounds like a normal woman to me... either that or maybe Asberger syndrome (my brother's wife mildly has it and she's fucking insane) I know her well enough to know it's not that. It's something a bit more severe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrs.cos Posted December 5, 2013 Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 Medicines have their place, but going to a doctor and trying some is no place to start. Besides a psychologist typically doesn't prescribe medicine, a psychiatrist does that. Pretty good difference between the two professionals. Youre right, i honestly sat here while posting that wondering if i was stating the right type of doctor. I always get confused which one can prescribe drugs. A psyciatrist is going to get her the right meds though to start her in the direction of getting her mind in a place where the help can start. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tractor Posted December 5, 2013 Author Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 I have never been diagnosed but I certainly have a bit of Asberger syndrome, autism spectrum disorder is the new label. Was much more pronounced years ago but now I'm pretty good at dealing with it. I agree, sounded like female problems to me for years but it's gotten worse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tractor Posted December 5, 2013 Author Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 Oh and another point that I always thought was a little off, she's almost never cried, not even when her mother died. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sully Posted December 5, 2013 Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 As I was reading through the thread, I was jokingly going to ask you if you're secretly married to my wife. But, then your last post about her almost never crying nullified that. I feel your pain, bro. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokin5s Posted December 5, 2013 Report Share Posted December 5, 2013 As I was reading through the thread, I was jokingly going to ask you if you're secretly married to my wife. But, then your last post about her almost never crying nullified that. I feel your pain, bro. Ditto Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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