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F-ing Tinder


BigOxley

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She's gonna try to peg him

 

Like he'll put up a fight...

 

No, so what we'll do is call you at a designated time and unless you say the phrase "I am OK" exactly we'll start divvying out your cars and tools. and probably, eventually come rescue/recover you.

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Who says overnight bag? Fuck that. Who calls "just because I wanna hear your voice" then offers you to sleep in another bedroom?

When I was 18 I took a girl to Coyote Ugly for our 2nd date (her pick). I went out to dinner with friends before hand and spent the whole movie in the bathroom shitting my brains out. (Probably still better than watching the movie).

 

After only sitting with her in the theatre for about 20 min of the movie I drove her home. The next day she called me and the Coyote Ugly sound track was playing in the background. She called it "our song" then told me she loved me. I told her that it was too fast for me to say the same. I didnt bang her at that time, but I kept her around because she was frisky and leaving for college in a few weeks, which would have allowed for a clean break.

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When I was 18 I took a girl to Coyote Ugly for our 2nd date (her pick). I went out to dinner with friends before hand and spent the whole movie in the bathroom shitting my brains out. (Probably still better than watching the movie).

 

After only sitting with her in the theatre for about 20 min of the movie I drove her home. The next day she called me and the Coyote Ugly sound track was playing in the background. She called it "our song" then told me she loved me. I told her that it was too fast for me to say the same. I didnt bang her at that time, but I kept her around because she was frisky and leaving for college in a few weeks, which would have allowed for a clean break.

 

 

Sooooo... did you bang her before she left for college?

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When I was 18 I took a girl to Coyote Ugly for our 2nd date (her pick). I went out to dinner with friends before hand and spent the whole movie in the bathroom shitting my brains out. (Probably still better than watching the movie).

 

After only sitting with her in the theatre for about 20 min of the movie I drove her home. The next day she called me and the Coyote Ugly sound track was playing in the background. She called it "our song" then told me she loved me. I told her that it was too fast for me to say the same. I didnt bang her at that time, but I kept her around because she was frisky and leaving for college in a few weeks, which would have allowed for a clean break.

 

http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/itsalwayssunny/images/9/98/1x4_Artemis.png/revision/latest?cb=20110814043327

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She says overnight bag. Haha

 

http://i690.photobucket.com/albums/vv265/kirks5oh/f511c9a9-371f-41fb-8aab-6d18c49302fe.jpg

 

This chick without make up will look like a walking dead zombie. Plus look at how pointy those elbows are

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  • 6 months later...

Bros. Fucking help.

 

Newly divorced (6-8 weeks ago) and started banging some girl on Tinder. Crazy in bed, crazy in everyday life. Saw each other for about 3 weeks and I "ended" things Friday. Holy fuck, she is nuts. Called me like 5 times last night, sent me about 40 texts yesterday and j only responded to like 2.

 

This is fun lol

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Bros. Fucking help.

 

Newly divorced (6-8 weeks ago) and started banging some girl on Tinder. Crazy in bed, crazy in everyday life. Saw each other for about 3 weeks and I "ended" things Friday. Holy fuck, she is nuts. Called me like 5 times last night, sent me about 40 texts yesterday and j only responded to like 2.

 

This is fun lol

 

Crazy is as crazy does. Ever thought to block her phone number?

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Had a very close friend hook up with a girl on tinder. She got preg the first time, months later he has moved them into a place she picked, furnished the place with items she picked. She got preg again and bounced.....she will not let him see his kids. We agree she just wanted kids and that was it. Now she loves the single mom life and is happy as can be.

 

 

#bitchesiscrazy

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Had a very close friend hook up with a girl on tinder. She got preg the first time, months later he has moved them into a place she picked, furnished the place with items she picked. She got preg again and bounced.....she will not let him see his kids. We agree she just wanted kids and that was it. Now she loves the single mom life and is happy as can be.

 

 

#bitchesiscrazy

 

WOW, that literally sounds like hell on earth.

 

Surprisingly I have a new Tinder story. Received a text from "ashley T" (my moniker for distinguishing who I met on tinder was just put a T on their name). She was basically looking to hook up. Now i was trying to be nice but i have no fucking idea who this girl is, what she looks like, fucking nothing. Add to the fact I haven't been on tinder in over two years. Apparently I made such an impression she held onto my number in case things didn't work out with her bf... which they didn't I guess. I politely informed her I wasn't available and she said text her if it didn't work out. I feel like I'm officially retired?

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