cptn janks Posted October 26, 2006 Report Share Posted October 26, 2006 I mean COME ON! I just get all clean and then I have to drop a deuce. It was a clinger too, not one of the good ones where you wipe and wonder if anything even came out because there is nothing on the tissue. DISCUSS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Karacho1647545492 Posted October 26, 2006 Report Share Posted October 26, 2006 one of the good ones where you wipe and wonder if anything even came out because there is nothing on the tissue. I believe you're referring to "Acein' It" or a "Clean Sweep" as I like to call them. Those are fabulous. I always shit before I take a shower, cuz you're about to get clean anyways and nothing makes the wake-up shower feel better than dropping a basketball sized chocolate mud baby in the porcelain tomb. And you can never deuce during a shower, because then you might slip off the seat, and the stank from your shit will get soaked in the walls with the steam. In conclusion, I hate droppin a deuce after a shower as well, but thats why I squeeze out my fudgesicles beforehand. And that, my friends, is Pooping 101. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cptn janks Posted October 26, 2006 Author Report Share Posted October 26, 2006 sometimes you dont have to poop before the shower though, because it takes a little bit for your poop to wake up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Karacho1647545492 Posted October 26, 2006 Report Share Posted October 26, 2006 sometimes you dont have to poop before the shower though, because it takes a little bit for your poop to wake up. i guess my butt and i are on the same wavelength or something, cuz i poop when its convenient and its usually predictable Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimTaylor751647545500 Posted October 26, 2006 Report Share Posted October 26, 2006 The pre-shower poop is a close 2nd to the first piss after you wake up in the morning. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Karacho1647545492 Posted October 26, 2006 Report Share Posted October 26, 2006 I've pooped in the shower before, on accident. It's a funny story.. I had just woken up, got in the shower, and sharted. I looked on the ground and saw a few little diarreah turds so I let the water hit my shoulder, aiming the water streaming down my arm running off my fingers at them to help break them free off the tub floor. Success, I merged them all into the middle drainward-bound stream and off they went like little mudboats. I bent over and spread my cheeks, letting the water hit my back and stream through my buttcrack to clean shop. I obviously don't learn much from my mistakes because I tried farting again.. while bent over. An anal explosion of half digested sam adams and chipotle spattered all over the wall, faucet, and girlfriend's loofa. I probably should have told her, but I thought it would be funnier if I didn't. It was. omfg i'm nominating this for best post of 2006. it had me and my roommate laughing our asses off, and people are coming in from the hall to read this and just fucking dying. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hilbillyhomeboy Posted October 26, 2006 Report Share Posted October 26, 2006 I've pooped in the shower before, on accident. It's a funny story.. I had just woken up, got in the shower, and sharted. I looked on the ground and saw a few little diarreah turds so I let the water hit my shoulder, aiming the water streaming down my arm running off my fingers at them to help break them free off the tub floor. Success, I merged them all into the middle drainward-bound stream and off they went like little mudboats. I bent over and spread my cheeks, letting the water hit my back and stream through my buttcrack to clean shop. I obviously don't learn much from my mistakes because I tried farting again.. while bent over. An anal explosion of half digested sam adams and chipotle spattered all over the wall, faucet, and girlfriend's loofa. I probably should have told her, but I thought it would be funnier if I didn't. It was. HAHAHA, about fell out of my chair. My God....that__was__awesome Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skinner Posted October 26, 2006 Report Share Posted October 26, 2006 I've pooped in the shower before, on accident. It's a funny story.. I had just woken up, got in the shower, and sharted. I looked on the ground and saw a few little diarreah turds so I let the water hit my shoulder, aiming the water streaming down my arm running off my fingers at them to help break them free off the tub floor. Success, I merged them all into the middle drainward-bound stream and off they went like little mudboats. I bent over and spread my cheeks, letting the water hit my back and stream through my buttcrack to clean shop. I obviously don't learn much from my mistakes because I tried farting again.. while bent over. An anal explosion of half digested sam adams and chipotle spattered all over the wall, faucet, and girlfriend's loofa. I probably should have told her, but I thought it would be funnier if I didn't. It was. that sir is classic. on a side note anyone ever take a crap soo big it left you hungry???? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OSUGT Posted October 26, 2006 Report Share Posted October 26, 2006 that sir is classic. on a side note anyone ever take a crap soo big it left you hungry???? yesterday. right after lunch Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rotarded1647545491 Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 And you can never deuce during a shower, because then you might slip off the seat, and the stank from your shit will get soaked in the walls with the steam. Ah, the rare but extremely toxic element FARTONIUM! Fartonium (far tone ee yum) Number 7.5 on the Periodic Table of Elements An unaturally occuring element created when bodily toxins in the form of methane gas, including small particulates of fecal matter, are expelled and mixed with shower steam. This element is highly toxic and causes instantainoius choking on your own bile and the overwelming urge to fling open the shower curtain/door and convulsively gasp for air. An extremely rare but lethal isotope of this element can be created by the ingestion of massive amounts of cheap beer, a campus gyro, and White Castles. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImUrOBGYN Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 Awesome... Awhile back I got a stomach virus and couldn't quit shitting or feeling like I had to shit. I wiped my ass so much it bled a little and hurt like hell. It got to where I was willing to get in the shower than wipe my ass everytime. Now, it's only the best tp for my butt's discerning tastes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thorne Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 Omg This Fucking Thread Made Me Shit Myself!@#!@#!@#!@#!@#!@#!@# Roflopter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
launchin1st Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 I've pooped in the shower before, on accident. It's a funny story.. I had just woken up, got in the shower, and sharted. I looked on the ground and saw a few little diarreah turds so I let the water hit my shoulder, aiming the water streaming down my arm running off my fingers at them to help break them free off the tub floor. Success, I merged them all into the middle drainward-bound stream and off they went like little mudboats. I bent over and spread my cheeks, letting the water hit my back and stream through my buttcrack to clean shop. I obviously don't learn much from my mistakes because I tried farting again.. while bent over. An anal explosion of half digested sam adams and chipotle spattered all over the wall, faucet, and girlfriend's loofa. I probably should have told her, but I thought it would be funnier if I didn't. It was. and the oscar for best post ever, goes to...... the shower shitter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lustalbert Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 Sticky this shit! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buck531 Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 That's a shitty situation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Browning Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 http://www.hostmypiconline.com/images/roflpuke2.gif Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
351mach11647545510 Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 lol, this is one FUCKED up thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Anna Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 How many times in life are you going to hear a girl ask "did you poop on my loofa?" Brian - 1 Rest of the world - never HAHA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buck531 Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 Tub girl ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yotaman88210 Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 I obviously don't learn much from my mistakes because I tried farting again.. while bent over. An anal explosion of half digested sam adams and chipotle spattered all over the wall, faucet, and girlfriend's loofa. OMFG!! I was having a shitty friday morning, I feel great now! Thank you Brian for sharing what may be the best story I have ever heard!! :funny: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Anna Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 Tub girl ? Yes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1qwk767 Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 rofl that was the best thing I Have read all morning damn that was great thanks again for spit milk all over my computer screen gosh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest drumer919 Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 I hate tub girl. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImUrOBGYN Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 How many times in life are you going to hear a girl ask "did you poop on my loofa?" Brian - 1 Rest of the world - never :funny: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
34bboley1647545507 Posted October 27, 2006 Report Share Posted October 27, 2006 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bristol_Stool_Scale Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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