HOA are biased but that is usually because of who is on the board. Can you get voted on the board? People just like to stick their noses in other people's business.
I live in Dublin, the ghetto of it behind Meijer and there is no HOA here. There are plenty of people that have $200k houses and crab grass yards. It does not bother me at all.
When I drive up through Muirfield does it look nice? Sure does. Does everyone have a tan house with fake bricks on the front? Sure do. Does everyone have sprinklers, sod and a perfect brick driveway? Sure do. Any of those homes have personality? Sure don't.
To each their own. You want a nice looking area and spend your time picking crab grass, get a nice place with a HOA.
You want to do what you want to your home? Live somewhere else but you might get that car with no wheels sitting in the driveway. I know my car has sat in my driveway with no wheel for a day or two.