Scruit

No, honey, you cleaned out the account that he let you know about.

Without guns, British robbers are increasingly resorting to using a finger to simulate a gun inside thier pocket. In response to this, the British Government has banned fingers.

UK gun laws have resulted in very little gun crime. Note I didn't say "less VIOLENT crime". They just stab each other instead.

Works in England. Oh wait, it doesn't.

Real Balla thieves just headbutt the driver's window.

That's not "new". My Bronco got broken into that way back in '98. F*ckers did every lock that way - both doors and the tailgate. Too lazy to hit the central locking button.

They won't sell that to the public though.

http://www.10tv.com/content/stories/2011/11/15/columbus-new-trend-in-robberies.html Cliffs: Thieves have a new way they can open your car whenever they want. We won't tell you how, though. I'm going to wet myself laughing if it's the tennis ball method. Or the keyfob-over-the-cellphone method.

Sorry about that.

Maybe the bike was no legit? Bike was already stolen or had no VIN etc? Definitely more to this story.

^^ Where will YOU be when your laxative kicks in?

All new breathalyser contracts should state that if the machine is discredited then we get our money back.

So is there a news story about this?

He won't run around any more unless you scratch his belly.

Someone has to 'shop Penn to replace that second 'n' with 'is'.

So what's on the for sale list? I've been thinking about getting a Glock. And will it fit in my Jock Strap o' Death?

Thought he was getting a Bersa.

Did we just invent a new test? There's the California Drop Test, and now the "Ohio Noot Kick Test". Somene (not it) stands there with the dick holster and gets hoofed solidly in the bojangles. If the pistol does not go off then the gun is safe for sale in Ohio.

Just remember - the bad guy isn't goign to stand there and let you get a sight picture. And he's probably not gonna announce himself as a "Bad guy". You need to be able to make those decisions quickly. This training is about putting you on the spot, interacting with people who may or may not be there to do you harm - and you'd better figure it out or you'll get shot, or you'll wind up shooting someone who meant you no harm. Better to make those mistakes on a training range than in real llife.

"Yo Dawg, I heard you like guns, so I put a gun on your gun so you can shoot while you shoot." Hey, My dick holder has one advance you guys don't have... Anyone tries to kick me squaar in the nootz will get his toes shot off.

What did you have? You had more guns there thean the rest of us combined.

This is Force-On-Force training at a school in NJ. This is what the Three Tango class is like (according to their website - I am working to confirm) http://www.popularmechanics.com/technology/military/weapons/a-day-of-intense-force-on-force-handgun-training

I'm assuming it's simunitions. This is not a classroom thing - this is real drills. For those who don't know what simunitions are - think regular pistols converted to fire paintballs on steroids. http://simunition.com/en/products/fx_marking_cartridges Normal semi-auto pistols, converted to fire simunitions. When you get hit YOU KNOW IT. Not paintballs, and not all classroom tlaking about stuff.

You spelled AWESOME wrong.

$100 for 6-7 hours. http://www.threetango.com/courses/forceonforce.html