My new favorite site

[Buck531]

http://qdb.us/top

 

(Feeks) Hey can anyone help me I've been building a computer?

(@Wabz) Whats up?

(Feeks) Well i built it but it wont turn on

(@Wabz) Is the PSU connected to the board and harddrive etc

(Feeks) Yeah I'm not fucking stupid

(@Wabz) lol ok then, can you hear the fan on the PSU?

(Feeks) Yeah so it's turned on ya fucking muppet

(@Wabz) Fair enough then

(@Wabz) There should be a little red switch on the back of the PSU saying 240

(Feeks) Yeah man

(Feeks) ??? Hurry up some of us dont have all day

(@Wabz) OK OK lol push it over so it says 115 and you'll get more power going to the board

(Feeks) Then Plug it in?

(@Wabz) Yeah

(KLine) hehe

@Wabz puts his fingers in his ears

(Feeks) You fucking bastard you blew it up

(@Wabz) No i told you how to blow it up

(@Wabz) You blew it up

(Feeks) Fucker!!

(@Wabz) !kb Feeks

—› mode: (Wanda) sets (+b *!*@host213-122-140-17.in-addr.btopenworld.com)

Comment: Why n00bs should be nice to IRC vetrans

 

<Backslash> So a friend of mind comes over to my house and stays the night

<Backslash> Now there is a computer and t.v. in my room so naturally she spent most of the day in there and since I only have once chair in it she sat on my bed

<Backslash> Well at like 4am she fell asleep on it while I was on the computer and I didn’t have the heart to wake her up so I slept on the couch downstairs

<Backslash> Like a month later I’m over at her house with a bunch of her friends and since there was no where to sleep I slept on the couch again

<Backslash> The next morning during breakfast one of her friends says you look tired

<Backslash> and I was like yeah I didn’t sleep great I’m kinda used to my bed

<Backslash> then my friend goes yeah your bed is awesome!

<Backslash> I froze and glanced over at her parents who gave me the most evil look I have ever seen…

 

<Arai> I use my right hand for everything except *one* thing.

<Arai> Not wanking.

<Arai> I wipe my ass with my left hand.

<Vhabion> I use toillet paper

[excell]

Try http://www.bash.org/ too.

[iwishiwascool]

<@codstar> rice crispies and hangovers don't go together

<@codstar> first time ive ever told a bowl of cereal to stfu

...

<glowsun> I heard about this guy who broke into a lion's den at the zoo

<glowsun> and got mauled

<glowsun> and people were talking about how there should have been better defenses put up to prevent people getting into the cage

<glowsun> a friend of mine suggested setting up some kind of deterrent

<glowsun> for example, putting some sort of fierce animal in the cage, which would attack anybody who climbed in

 

[Oni] FUCK!

[Oni] I'm just about out of black ink

[Krypton] printer?

[Oni] No, the type I disperse to run from predators.

 

I chuckled

[alibies]

#29482 (4698/7260)

 

docsigma2000: jesus christ man

docsigma2000: my son is sooooooo dead

c8info: Why?

docsigma2000: hes been looking at internet web sites in fucking EUROPE

docsigma2000: HE IS SURFING LONG DISTANCE

docsigma2000: our fucking phone bill is gonna be nuts

c8info: Ooh, this is bad. Surfing long distance adds an extra $69.99 to your bill per hour.

docsigma2000: ...!!!!!! FUCK FUCK FUCK

docsigma2000: is there some plan we can sign up for???

docsigma2000: cuz theres some cool stuff in europe, but i dun wanna pauy that much

c8info: Sorry, no. There is no plan. you'll have to live with it.

docsigma2000: o well, i ccan live without europe intenet sites.

docsigma2000: but till i figure out how to block it hes sooooo dead

c8info: By the way, I'm from Europe, your chatting long distance.

** docsigma2000 has quit (Connection reset by peer)

[Nitrousbird]

<glowsun> I heard about this guy who broke into a lion's den at the zoo

<glowsun> and got mauled

<glowsun> and people were talking about how there should have been better defenses put up to prevent people getting into the cage

<glowsun> a friend of mine suggested setting up some kind of deterrent

<glowsun> for example, putting some sort of fierce animal in the cage, which would attack anybody who climbed in

I actually laughed out loud at that one; awesome.

[HotCarl]

<dev-hda0> Damn... while coming home from the store, this drunk came up to me, and was like,

<dev-hda0> "Hey, you big black ******! Loose-lips McGee, why don't you go back to your monkey relatives? Bet you couldn't even add 1 + 1."

<dev-hda0> And I calmly respond, "What's the derivative of cosecant(x)?"

<dev-hda0> he just replied, "fuck you" and left...

*** Join: Elexon

<Elexon> shit, I just got owned so badly by a black guy on the street...

[HotCarl]

<luqin> senior year

<luqin> my roomate is on a job interview for sam adams

<luqin> he's on a ridealong with a sales guy

<luqin> they start talking about music

<luqin> sales guy goes

<luqin> "gwen stefani is pretty hot"

<luqin> my roomate is trying to be professional

<luqin> says "yeah she's pretty attractive"

<MadHack-> heh

<luqin> 30 seconds of silence

<luqin> sales guy goes

<luqin> "I'd eat her ass"

<dave__> HAHAHAHAHA

<MadHack-> ahahahahaha

<erobbins> HAHAHAHAHA

<russur> HAHAHAHAHA

<dave__> fuck i just spit out my lemonade

[Casper]

women ask for it

they act all old and mature

and then you stick your cock up their ass

and they get all bitchy

"I"M ONLY 13, I'M ONLY 13!!!"

[Casper]

man

unix manuals would be so much cooler

if they had porn in them

like "Basics of the Bash Shell"

i'd read that shit

[Casper]

get oral_sex_training_video.mpg

Oops wrong window.

[Casper]

oiuyniyu98h987h89yh87y98yjn987j987y897yhkiuk;''''

sorry.. there was a spider on my keyboard.

[Casper]

Really, celerons make me laugh

The white trash chip

[Benner]

Sorry if this offends anyone but I lost it when I read this.

 

#30020 (4690/7210)

**You know you're in a Racist channel when you see this**

(19:22:54)<Jaayy> I like my coffee the way I like my ******s.

(19:22:59)<Naive-EOC> Dead?

(19:23:01)<Derid-EOC> In the Field?

(19:23:02)<Ball-licker> In jail?

(19:23:06)<Humur> Killing each other?

(19:23:08)<Naive-EOC> Stealing?

(19:23:09)<Sailym> Covered in blood?

(19:23:11)<Humur> 5$ a piece?

(19:23:13)<Derid-EOC> Stupid?

(19:23:20)<Jaayy> ...

(19:23:31)<Jaayy> BLACK YOU FUCKING RACIST BASTARDS! I LIKE MY COFFEE BLACK!

[Farkas]

<tatclass> YOU ALL SUCK DICK

<tatclass> er.

<tatclass> hi.

<andy\code> A common typo.

<tatclass> the keys are like right next to each other.

 

 

Hands down funniest one.

[mrs.cos]

<@Logan> I spent a minute looking at my own code by accident.

<@Logan> I was thinking "What the hell is this guy doing?"

 

 

I often wonder if this ever happens to Nathan.

[SpaceGhost]

<SenioR> whahahah fravec! I fucked your mother!!

<@Fravec> Dad, buzz off, I'm talking to friends here...

Comment: never teach your dad how to use IRC

 

[copperhead]

My new favorite site: http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com

[ImUrOBGYN]

<SenioR> whahahah fravec! I fucked your mother!!

<@Fravec> Dad, buzz off, I'm talking to friends here...

Comment: never teach your dad how to use IRC

 

 

lmao!! There are a lot of funny ones in this thread, but for some reason this one just cracked me up. Guess I visualized this one. Which is weird since I have no dad. (I'm a clone. )

[ImUrOBGYN]

#29166 (4411/6381)

<BoZmAn20> Goddamnit, my ex girlfriend has such horrible taste in men

<BoZmAn20> wait

<BoZmAn20> Shit.

 

People are funny. tastin

[ImUrOBGYN]

Thorne on a Friday or Saturday night.

 

<@Logan> I spent a minute looking at my own code by accident.

<@Logan> I was thinking "What the hell is this guy doing?"

 

Sorry, Thorne. Made me think of you again.

 

<erno> hm. I've lost a machine.. literally _lost_. it responds to ping, it works completely, I just can't figure out where in my apartment it is.

[schmuckingham]

HAHAHHAHAHAA

 

<blazemore> LITTLETON, Colo. - Colorado officials plan to try a 15-year-old boy as an adult for allegedly offering a Sony PlayStation to have his aunt killed.

<FlipTopBx> is it modded?

[SpaceGhost]

lmao!! There are a lot of funny ones in this thread, but for some reason this one just cracked me up. Guess I visualized this one. Which is weird since I have no dad. (I'm a clone. )

 

I may do this one day if I ever have a son, when he is like 17-20 Years Old.

[thorne]

I love that one,.

[DeathSandwich]

<SpannerGO0> HEY BICTHES

*** SpannerGO0 was kicked by sam88 (don't be a douche)

<BicThes> he was talking to me i think

<sam88> whoops

[Draco-REX]

<erno> hm. I've lost a machine.. literally _lost_. it responds to ping, it works completely, I just can't figure out where in my apartment it is.

This ACTUALLY happened. I forget what school it was, but they had a bunch of servers. One server that had been running for years needed a physical reset. So they went to the server room to bounce the power. Well, they couldn't find it. The box was on the network, but they could not find it at all. After tracing the network wires they discovered that it had been accidentally walled-in during a renovation something like 4 years before.