Jump to content

my dad passed away tonight....


Guest tbutera2112

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 137
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

I lost my dad last year. Same reason.

 

I consider myself to be very in control of my emotions and conditioned responses. It affected me in ways that I could have never predicted. I tried to go back to work 2 days later which was a terrible mistake. My grief manifested itself in ways completely unrelated to the circumstance.

 

It will make you appreciate what you have. It will make you healthier and more concerned with your own mortality. It will get better... but it will never go away completely.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest tbutera2112

today was a lot better...my gf spent the day with me after we got some stuff done...me and my mom got a funeral home and got showing times set up....were picking up his truck tomorrow and bringing it home... showing is saturday and then sunday im getting my friend derek to come help me get my dads stuff... hes got so much stuff... tool boxes, tools, all kinds of stuff.... going to park his truck in my driveway until i can sell it...my gfs dad is going to let me park the iroc there until i can sell it...and i dont even know how im going to get my dads bike from his gfs house...i dont have a license and the roads are so bad... i dont even know where to put it...but ill figure that out... he also has a 4 wheeler...his friend has it and is rebuilding the blown motor, but my dad didnt order parts yet, and i dont want to spend the money to fix it, and who even knows if the guy would still do it for me since my dad isnt around anymore...he was rebuilding it free...so im just going to tell him he can keep it

 

im also going to be getting a duffle bag full of handguns, and a few rifles....most were my grandpas, and my dad got them when he died, but i dont know if they were registered to my dad or still to my grandpa...but once i get those ill need help figuring out what i need to do to legaly sell them...i told my mom i want to keep one hand gun to have around for when i move out and have my own place...she said thats fine but wants the rest gone...so if anyone knows how all that works, i would really appreciate a PM..

 

i talked to my mom today about the car and she said that my dad bought it years ago when i was little and put less than 10k on it... said he never drove it, and that he put a lot of money into it but he lost interest and was never going to really get back into it....then when i bought my car he started working on his just so he could get it going and go to the track with me so we would have something to do together...my mom said that i can keep the car if i want but that i shouldnt keep it for sentimental value...she says my dad would much rather see me sell it and pay off the majority if not all of my student loans from school...

 

theres just so much stuff to do and i have no idea how it all works...my family has been a huge help and were all just taking it a day at a time....i never realized how many friends my dad had until today...i think even he would be surprised... weve had people calling from florida all the way to cali just to pay their respects...we've had people call who we dont even know... his showing should be a huge turn out... i miss him so much, and apparently a lot of other people do too....he was such a good guy

 

oh, and i think brian from dyno tune may know him or one of his friends...i found a couple of brians cards in my dads wallet and also he was a contact in my dads phone...but it could have just been for future reference i dont know.... he was also a member of lady liberty for a little bit *bike club...i think thats what its called* .... its so hard not being able to just pick up the phone and call him...

 

also, once the dust settles, i will be continuing the 460 swap in my car...my dad was really excited about it when i told him i was doing it and he thought it would real cool when it was done...ive kinda been slow with doing it and just gathering parts...but once things smooth out and i get all my stuff taken care of, im going to go ahead and complete it...just wish he would be here to go on the first joy ride with me...im sure he will be right there in spirit, sitting in the passenger seat with a grin...

 

if anyone has any interest in a 2001 harley f150, or an 89 iroc, shoot me a PM...not details or anything or prices or anything yet, but ill keep you in mind for when i do get ready...we dont have room for all his toys and i need to get rid of them quickly for me personally...it will help me move on not having to come out every day and see his truck sitting in the driveway...his bike has a salvage title and wont be worth selling...he wanted that bike ever since he was a teenager and they first came out... took him 12 years to finally own it... he got hit by a car on it and it was totaled... he fixed it up and got it custom painted with a candy blue paint with a marble pattern...ill be keeping it and riding it once i get my license back and check on insurance...its a 97 vmax

 

ive really just been trying to keep my mind off of stuff...it helps that i dont have one bad memory of my dad...i cant think back to one time in my whole life that my dad was mad at me or we argued...every time we saw or talked to each other, we had a great time... it helps that the time i did have with him was so positive... we put brakes on my moms car last sunday, and now theyre squeeling really bad from one wheel and i have no idea why... i keep wanting to pick my phone up and call him and ask him...he always knew how to fix everything... every time i hear her brakes squeel all i think about is how much i miss my dad...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Don't make a decision about selling anything for at least a month. Give yourself some time to figure things out as to what you want to keep, and what has to go.

As for the bike, the guys in Daily Ride can tell you how to strap the bike in the bed of your Dad's truck to move it.

If you decide to sell the guns, be sure to have them appraised before you sell them. You mentioned that some of your Grandfather's guns are in that group, and you may have a gem or two and not realize it. I know we were shocked when we found out how much my Grandmother's old shotgun was worth.

 

Finally, when it comes to your Dad's car; YOU make the decision. Don't try to guess what your Dad would have wanted, or listen to what other think he would have wanted. Make the decision based on how important that car is to YOU. And again, wait at least a month before you make that decision.

 

Take your time with this stuff. If you have to store things for a couple months, do it. It's better than making a fast decision that you might regret down the line.

 

BTW, if your Dad's truck won't fit the bike, say the word, and I'll bring my parents' truck out. I'm unemployed, so it ain't like I've got anything to do.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest tbutera2112
Don't make a decision about selling anything for at least a month. Give yourself some time to figure things out as to what you want to keep, and what has to go.

As for the bike, the guys in Daily Ride can tell you how to strap the bike in the bed of your Dad's truck to move it.

If you decide to sell the guns, be sure to have them appraised before you sell them. You mentioned that some of your Grandfather's guns are in that group, and you may have a gem or two and not realize it. I know we were shocked when we found out how much my Grandmother's old shotgun was worth.

 

Finally, when it comes to your Dad's car; YOU make the decision. Don't try to guess what your Dad would have wanted, or listen to what other think he would have wanted. Make the decision based on how important that car is to YOU. And again, wait at least a month before you make that decision.

 

Take your time with this stuff. If you have to store things for a couple months, do it. It's better than making a fast decision that you might regret down the line.

 

BTW, if your Dad's truck won't fit the bike, say the word, and I'll bring my parents' truck out. I'm unemployed, so it ain't like I've got anything to do.

 

well my dad wanted to get rid of his truck anyways....i cant afford the insurance on it and really have no desire to keep it...i love it, but its not practical at all...im selling it and then using some of the money to put in savings and some of it to buy myself a new DD and getting rid of my probe... the truck is gone no question.... i still havent decided on the car for sure, but im most likely going to sell it also...its been nothing but a headache to my dad...he hasnt driven it in 5 years....

 

also, my dads bike will not fit in his truck...harley trucks have a tiny bed... if you would pick up his bike for me that would be amazing of you... ill buy your gas... i would be needing it picked up from sunbury, and im not sure where to put it yet...so i would have to get back to you when i find a place to put it...im going to try and rearrange my garage...if i can move the toolbox away from the front of my car i can pull the car up to the wall and put the bike in behind it...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hey man I know there are no words or nothing anyone can do to replace your dad , but if you need anything especially help with any of your cars or families cars DO NOT hesitate to pm me, also even if you need a friend or someone to hang out with or drink a 12 pack with or whatnot pm me and ill give you my number, Im sorry for your loss and you and your family and friends are in my prayers.....

 

 

God Bless...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest tbutera2112
Hey man I know there are no words or nothing anyone can do to replace your dad , but if you need anything especially help with any of your cars or families cars DO NOT hesitate to pm me, also even if you need a friend or someone to hang out with or drink a 12 pack with or whatnot pm me and ill give you my number, Im sorry for your loss and you and your family and friends are in my prayers.....

 

 

God Bless...

 

thanks a lot man...and if youre serious about the help, you could check the tech section...me and my dad did brakes on my moms car last weekend and i think something is messed up...with everything going on i just dont have to energy to deal with them...if you have any ideas then ide love the input...i tried calling rob, i was just going to drop him off the car and pay him to fix it, but i havent gotten ahold of him... im hoping theres a shop on here, maybe 614streets, that will just fix it for me..i dont want to deal with it...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Tyler, I am terribly sorry to hear this. As was said before, your friends are all there for you. I can't even imagine what it must be like to go through this. Keep your chin up man, and just think of the good times. I greatly applaud you for being strong through this.

 

You and your family are in my thoughts.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest tbutera2112
Tyler, I am terribly sorry to hear this. As was said before, your friends are all there for you. I can't even imagine what it must be like to go through this. Keep your chin up man, and just think of the good times. I greatly applaud you for being strong through this.

 

thanks a lot...im trying my best... it helps that i have so much support from here... i dont really have many friends outside of cr... just my gf...i got mitch and derek (micholi and ponyjr) that i met before cr...but all of us work and go to school and we never hang out because of schedules...my gf is really the only person i see aside from coworkers...but she came and spent the day with me to help keep my mind off of things...and her family is taking me on vacation next week to either disney in florida or were going to go to california and site see...it will be nice to just get away from everything for a few...UPS gave me all of next week off to rest up and get stuff settled...so im just going to take it all one step at a time...it all just seems like a dream, like im going to wake up and it not be real... my whole life my dads been a phone call away... i cant wait to pick up his truck...he has a voice recorder built into his visor that he would talk into to track mileage in his truck.... i cant wait to hear his voice again...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

thanks a lot man...and if youre serious about the help, you could check the tech section...me and my dad did brakes on my moms car last weekend and i think something is messed up...with everything going on i just dont have to energy to deal with them...if you have any ideas then ide love the input...i tried calling rob, i was just going to drop him off the car and pay him to fix it, but i havent gotten ahold of him... im hoping theres a shop on here, maybe 614streets, that will just fix it for me..i dont want to deal with it...

 

I am serious man not just about auto help but anyhting man, I mean im not gonna get out of bed at 4 am to bring you mcdonalds breakfast but you get the idea, pm me your number or aim screen name or both this weather sucks but i dont care you could use the help and I am more than willing to lend a hand at no charge of course.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...