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F-ing Tinder


BigOxley

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So, it's been a dry spell and decide to hit up tinder. meet with a couple of girls, the last one isn't super cute but cute enough. real big tits compared to her body... so whatever.

 

get with her last night, she wanted me to go to happy hour with her friends whom i've never met. said "thanks, but no thanks"... she comes over afterward. she half in the bag so i take her to dinner down the street.

 

we get back to my place, start making out. she decides to take it to the bedroom. cool. strip down and reach for the condoms. go to pound town. she gets a weird look on her face and stops. asks if i'm wearing a condom, i say "yeah why?" SHE FUCKING STARTS CRYING WHILE MY DICK INSIDE HER. anti-boner engaged.

 

wake up in the morning. ask wtf that was all about. she says that she is mildly allergic to latex and never bangs with condoms and isn't currently on birth control.

 

needless to say, im never going to see her again.

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Gross, between these and stories I've heard from friends I can whole heartedly say I'm glad I married before tinder even existed.

It reeks of being a microphone for the broken and dysfunctional, like the comments section of... anything.

 

Have to agree, been married 15 years and I sure wouldn't trade it for stories like that shit. Pass.

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This may offend some... But good chances for "excellent" relationships dry up as you approach 30.

 

All my "I'm loving being single" friends (when we were 25) are now shitting their pants at age 32 because it seems like the "market" is full of damaged goods. My friends who are actually on Match.com and trying to find a mate are finding some pretty weird women.

 

The "I moonlight as a bus driver" chick

The girl with the dick nose

The girl who was a full blown alky

The girl with wide hips and no tits

 

I mean... There's a reason they aren't married already.

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Gross, between these and stories I've heard from friends I can whole heartedly say I'm glad I married before tinder even existed.

It reeks of being a microphone for the broken and dysfunctional, like the comments section of... anything.

 

 

 

Also, this. Tinder be a cesspool from what I hear from my single buddies.

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This may offend some... But good chances for "excellent" relationships dry up as you approach 30.

 

All my "I'm loving being single" friends (when we were 25) are now shitting their pants at age 32 because it seems like the "market" is full of damaged goods. My friends who are actually on Match.com and trying to find a mate are finding some pretty weird women.

 

The "I moonlight as a bus driver" chick

The girl with the dick nose

The girl who was a full blown alky

The girl with wide hips and no tits

 

I mean... There's a reason they aren't married already.

 

 

I've resorted to setting my actual age lower and aiming for the mid-20s girls.

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I'm not really looking for a love connection, obviously. The good thing about tinder is that girls are swamped by guys, so if you don't text them for a week they move on. Bad thing, if you like banging one of the girls and want to make her a repeat offender the same thing happens.

 

I found a really cute little red head a few weeks ago, banged her a couple of times. Tried setting up subsequent bang sessions with little luck. Maybe I'm not putting it down well enough?

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