Dr. Pomade

Brothers is a central hub of douchebaggery. Fuck that place.

There are no side effects that I know of with respect to using whey protein (or any protein supplements). Well, you tend to get a little gassy (*insert fart noise here*), but protein does that to you. As for side effects of building huge muscles, there are many, from hot chicks asking to have sex with you often, people asking for your autograpgh, being asked if you're a male model, and so on.

Listen, you don't need a trainer. Nothing against them, but at this point you won't be doing anything that you can't just learn on your own by thumbing through a fitness magazine. What you do need is commitment. This is not me trying to sound like a military recruiter. Instead, I'm trying to say that, in order for this to work for you the way you want it to, then you are going to have to set aside the time to do it right. You said you want to put on 10 pounds of lean muscle - that's not easy to do. In fact, it's quite difficult, and it's going to take time and effort on your part. Just like anything else that's worthwhile in life, it's only going to work if you add the correct ingredients.

I think it's cheaper to take supplements (and, by supplements, I mean protein powder/shakes) than it is to eat more food. Sure, if you want to get fat, then you can just eat a ton of junk (e.g., cheeseburgers, pizza, ice cream, doughnuts) - you'll put on a lot of weight in no time. Of course, you'll be a fat ass and look like shit, but you'll be heavier. In order to put on "good weight" (i.e., muscle), you'll need to eat the right things - turkey, chicken, steak, and eggs. (Also, tuna is great, but I saw that you hate tuna. I do too, BTW. I've tried for a few years now to develop a taste to it and just can't.) None of the foods that are good for you that promote muscle growth - the turkeys and the chickens and the steaks - are cheap. In fact, their fucking expensive. Believe me, it is much more economical and easier to go buy some protein powder for $30 and get 40 shakes out of it (at 20g of protein per scoop/shake) than it is to go buy a bunch of turkey breasts and have to worry about making it and then eating all that fucking turkey. Seriously, there's only so much turkey you can eat in a day. Whey protein should become your best friend. In fact, at this point, it's the only protein you need to worry about. Muscleheads will take your fucking ear off about casein protein and soy protein and protein this and protein that; listen, you just worry about whey protein and leave it at that. Now, there's a bunch of different brands of whey protein - EAS, Myoplex, and so on - but they're all the same thing: whey protein. You can find whey protein just about anywhere, from any nutrition store to Kroger. I usually buy EAS whey protein from Target - it usually costs about $24 for a cannister of it. Again, it doesn't really matter what the brand is or who makes it - it just matters that it's whey protein. Buy it and love it. Protein powders don't taste great. Some taste better than others, and some just taste like fucking shit. I like EAS because it doesn't taste like shit. I mix my protein powder with milk because it tastes halfway decent. Some guys drink their protein with water - I can't because I think it tastes like fucking watery hell. You'll find out quick what you like and don't like. Some guys say don't mix it with milk because you'll get fat. Punch those fucking guys in the face and then show them your rock hard abs because that shit is false; drinking it with milk (skim, 1 percent, or 2 percent) actually has several advantages (which involve fancy terms like "casein" protein which I told you not to worry about, so don't). If you go the protein route, then spend a couple of bucks and guy a blender. Seriously - you don't want to try to drink protein powder without a blender. Shit gets all clumped up, and that's never fun. Just buy the blender; you'll use it several times every day, believe me. When to drink your whey protein is key. Here are the two most important times to drink whey protein: just before your workout, and immediately after. And you don't have to drink a lot of it pre-workout; 15g will suffice. As for post-workout, you'll want to consume at least 20g, and maybe 40g. So one shake before, and one shake immediately after your workout. Live by this. As you become a musclebuilding monster, you'll add whey protein shakes at other points during the day, like immediately when you wake up. But, for now, just remember, one before and one immediately after. Fuck, I bet you just put on three pounds of lean muscle just reading this. Tea (and coffee) are fine, so no need to quit it. In fact, there are many (including me) who believe that your workout (and gains) can be enhanced substantially by using caffeine in some form before your workout. This type of stuff you don't really need to worry about right now, but, at some point, you may want to add caffeine to your pre-workout meal. At this point, just know that tea is fine to keep on your menu.

There is nothing conservative nor reliable about doing a TT set-up to push out 700hp on a near-stock C5 Z06 engine. Wnaplay, my vote is for the C5.

IMO - based on what I've read and my experience - 80% of what you look like comes down to what you eat. You can be in the gym for two hours every day, but if you eat like shit, you'll look like shit. If you want to gain muscle (i.e., good weight, not bad weight), then you need to be stuffing yourself with protein. At this point, I'd seriously rethink your no supplements stance, as protein powder is really the best way to signifcantly and easily up the amount of protein you're taking in. Also, whey protein powder - the first kind of protein powder you'll want to start with - is actually reasonably priced, so it won't break you. As a rule of thumb, you want to take in daily 1 to 1.5 grams of protein for every pound you weigh. So, for you, you'll want to be eating at least 145 grams of protein per day. In addition to protein shakes (which, again, is what I'd advise using), you'll want to be eating a bunch of turkey, chicken, tuna, steak, and eggs. However, you have to be careful and sensible about how you eat them - that is, you can't kill your diet by drowning all you food with mayo and fatty dressings and all that other bad stuff. Rule of thumb: if it tastes good, it probably isn't good for you. If you want to stay lean/relatively ripped, you have got to stay away from heavy doses of carbs. Doesn't mean that you can't have a slice of pizza every now and again, it just means you can't having fucking Massey's for dinner three times a week. Similarly, ditch the soda and start drinking lots and lots and lots of fucking water. Drink water even when you aren't thirsty. Again, IMO, it comes down to diet. Sure, you need to be in the gym, and, to bulk up, I would probably work out only three to four times per week. When you work out, you need to be lifting heavy (i.e., four to six reps per set) and lifting to exhaustion (i.e., to the point where you feel fucking dead). Sensibly, you need to give your muscles - which, by working out really hard, you will be systematically breaking down so they can build back up bigger - time to adequately rest and recover.

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y205/iguanaspit/schnauzer_wallpaper-1.jpg

NOOOOOOOO! Only idiots post schnauzies!

http://www.thevine.com.au/resources/BLOGGER/jl-petMovie.jpg

Wait, hold on, there's actually such a thing as "Dudefest?" Like, it's an actual event?

Are the samoas the ones with the chocolate and caramel and coconut? If so, then those things are fucking delicious and you can sign me up for two boxes of them.

Shit. Resetting my Tom Tom and headed there now. Oh mah wai now guize!

This guy wears those speedos when he takes a dip in the ICK STREAM!!!1!!!

I'm posting this from the corner of 19th and Summit. All I see here are what appear to be very slow Supras and Asian men dressed as lifeguards. Did I go to the wrong 19th and Summit, or is this what I was supposed to see?

Why do you keep saying, "This is for me, Doug?" Do you mean, "This is for you, Doug?" And you seem like a full-blown playa, brah. Show these dudes what's up with the nudes, brah.

But I heart the Louis dog pic.

Seriously, that dog is the opposite of thrilled.

TRANSVESTITE SCHNAUZIE IS UNISEXUAL.

Wait, maybe it's Queen Schnauzie...

King Schnauzie has declared this thread worthy of three King Schnauzies. DO NOT IRE THE WRATH OF THE KING SCHNAUZIE. http://files.dogster.com/pix/dogs/30/453330/453330_1168385982.jpg http://files.dogster.com/pix/dogs/30/453330/453330_1168385982.jpg http://files.dogster.com/pix/dogs/30/453330/453330_1168385982.jpg

This is quite a DeEarly depature for you.

A non-turbo Supra is about as cool as something else appearing in this post. http://www.dunkindoggies.com/images/molly1.jpg

I don't think I've ever been hotter for you than I am right now. Fuck you, SEC. You just got fucking exploited by a non-BCS team, and you looked fucking SLOOOOOOW in the process. Utah manhandled them. Alabama managed to score exactly one offensive touchdown the entire game. Overfuckingrated is right. P.S. Chris Green, I'm feeling you on your post about Utah, their enthusiasm, and their overall play. I was one of the people who thought they would lose - I am very happy to say I was very fucking wrong. P.S. Kenny, just positive repped you on the SEC speed comment. Sorry, forgot to fill in a comment - I was so excited to rep you and then commence fapping that I clicked it prematurely.

HAHAHAHAHA fumble by Bama, recovered by Utah!

That holding penalty just killed Utah's drive. Alabama had no answer for the Asiago (sp?) back that they were direct-snapping it to. Holding penalty brought back a first down run and made it 2nd and 19. About 5 minutes left now, and Alabama must score to stay in this.