Relationships with your parents

[El Karacho1647545492]

This I guess is more for the younger folk around here. First off, are your parents together, separated, divorced, nonexistent (i.e. don't know your dad or mom) deceased, etc? Then describe it.

 

My parents have been happily married for 25 years and are at/around the 50 yr old mark, and I'd say my relationship with them is pretty awesome. They disciplined me a lot as a kid but let me kinda roam when they figured I had a good head on my shoulders. Nowadays I'm really close with them, especially I think because they're both getting through the generation gap and being really techno-savvy. I text and IM with my mom at least daily, correspond with my dad via email about as frequently, and we call each other all the time with random news. Fortunately for both of us, they're not savvy enough to have discovered the horrors of the internet like goatse, etc, but I think that's good.

[Farkas]

My dad started texting me as of recent, and really seems to enjoy it regardless of how slow it is for him to form any words with the small keypad... It's almost hilarious how long it takes him to be honest.

[cNeutron]

I have a great relationship with my rents. I do with my mom I talk to her almost every day. I did with my dad until he died almost 2 years ago in a motorcycle accident. He was one of my bestfriends. A pain of losing a parent so young that I wouldnt wish on my worst enemy. They we married for 26 years. My rents were really cool to me as a kid. I believe they raised me really well. My mom doesnt text she is old school only wants to talk on the phone. She knows how to use the computer pretty well. My dad texted alot back in the day. He was great with computers since he was a illustrator and used them all the time.

[sol740]

The older I get the more I realize how much of an ass I was. Appreciation for good parents going up and up. As far as the relationship we had, I had some real issues as a teen w/ the law, and authority in general. So it was rocky at its best. They were always there for me though, and never let me fuck up too bad. After I hit my 20's we got super close again, because I grew up. Now I'm a parent ... god help me ...

[Sully]

I've been told several times that I should write a book because of everything I've been through. I was thinking about doing so and was going to title it "How I Met My Mother", but then shortly after I thought of that, the sitcom aired called "How I Met Your Mother". No lie.

In the short, I was raised and adopted by my great-grandparents. I met my dad when I was around 10 or 11. I just found my mom about 4 years ago. I don't really talk to my dad anymore because his current wife is a fucking bitch and rules him like no other.

I talk to my mom at least every other day. Her husband is the coolest and I already consider him more of a dad than my dad ever was. I will be sending him a father's day card and won't even bother giving my dad the time of day.

Anywho, my great-grandfather died when I was 15. Since he was like my dad, it was an extemely difficult experience for me. After that, I became pretty rebellious against my great-grandmother. Her and I fought quite a bit. She passed away about 1 and 1/2 years ago and now I regret how I acted toward her during my teens.

 

For those of you youngin's out there, please, treat your parents with respect. They won't be around forever. They might have been tough on you while you were growing up, but it was for your own good. No matter what you think, they DO know more than you, and they know what is best for you.

[Chad is Dead]

I used to be bad w/ my parents....I moved to North Carolina and wouldn't answer their calls until I realized I missed them and moved back home......then it was all good until I went into business w/ my dad and hated hearing from him multiple times a day and kind of had a falling out. My mom and I have always been cool though and now that there is no family business it's getting better.

[Razorback]

Parents are still married, both in their mid-50's so they've been married around 35 years. I have an awesome relationship with them -- they live next door so I see and talk to them daily. As many do, I also regret being a stupid teenager, but as my mom tells me on the times when I've apologized for being a brat, it's part of growing up and parents need to pretty much expect it. I'm very appreciative of everything they've done for me and all the times they've been there for me. For those of you on this board who are still in your teenage years -- truly appreciate your parents and the things they do for you. Try to do your part in having a good solid relationship with them -- you will be so glad you did later in life.

[Rally Pat]

Uhg, where do I start...

 

My dad died in 2004 from cancer. I cant say what kind, because it was all kinds, spawned from colon cancer he had in the late nineties.

 

Here is how I was raised: My sister would go with my mom and do chick things, I would go with my dad and do dude things. Work on the rally car, go to junkyards, ect ect. They would shop for clothes, or whatever bullshit we could have really cared less about.

 

Since my dad died, you are asking a polar opposite to mix with an environment he doesn't belong in. My mom has never approved of "car stuff", I guess you would say. She was a navigator for my dad once, and didn't want to do that ever again.

 

In short, we fight CONSTANTLY, and my ass needs to move out ASAP. I'm glad I graduate soon.

[Patrick]

I guess I have an okay relationship at best with my parents-they tolerate my guitar playing, my car BS, and really don't care what I do, within reason, as long as all school work gets done. And I can play whatever music I like, as long as it isn't rap-which I completely agree with.

 

They try and support me in my every endeavor, even if they don't like it. My mom hated my first RX-7, and probably does my current one, as well. I'd have to reiterate, I have an okay relationship. I like visiting my parents at work, even my mom's job at 5:45AM in a school cafeteria, and my dad at the Kroger corp. office in Westerville. They've been married since...83, I'm thinking, so it would be around 24 years. I've never seen them fight, ever. My house is a pretty happy and lax one.

[HAOLE]

I had a wonderful childhood until I was about 11-12 years old. My Father started the Budweiser (Bud Dumber) I.V. And it went down hill from there. Every night he would come home and want to start fights. When I say every night, I mean every night. Dinner at my house was a horrible time. Dad was drunk at the table, barking orders about how I cut my food, how I hold my fork, how many times I chewed. As I got older things began to escalate to physical fights. It was horrible to have a boxing match in your front yard with your father while the neighbors looked on. Sometime the cops would need to be called. Back in those days the cops did not automatically arrest someone like they do now.

 

I remember When I was in my early twenties my Grandfather (Dad's Dad) told me I "need to have more respect for my father" my response to him was "would you respect a guy who came to you house and want to start a fist fight on a nightly basis?" I remember the dumbfounded look on his face.

 

This is why I never drink alcohol. It is responsible for more broken homes than any other substance.

 

The good news is after many years of a bad relationship with my father, I have forgiven him and now we get along ok as long as he is not drinking.

 

My mother was a good lady, she died in 1994, at the age of 42. It is strange to think that I am only 7 years younger than my mother was when she passed away. I could not imagine my wife leaving me in the next 7 years.

 

Good thread!

[SpaceGhost]

I see my Dad every year or so, and my Mom 3 times a week. After having my daughter, I have to ask "what the fuck was wrong with you" to his face, he and my mom divorced when I was 2. I saw him after that when I was 14. You couldn't cage me and keep me away from my daughter, I really can't understand it now. I used to think "well he was doing some cool stuff so I understand", (Racing Superbike in Germany, Military Pilot ect). Now there is nothing more cool than when I pick my daughter up from day care 3 days a week or when I come home and she sees me. There is no amount of money or "cool" job that could keep me away from her for 12 years. Can't explain it, just the best feeling in the world when she stumbles over to me with her arms up and a huge smile and she hugs me. He hasn't seen his Granddaughter yet, I think he will this year, and when he does I am going to ask this difficult question. Not sure what answer I will get, whatever the answer is unless he actually admits to be being a selfish fucking retard it will not answer anything, but I have to hear the excuse. I don't understand anymore.

[GRN96WS6]

I have an excellent relationship with my parents. My mother died when I was 10 and my dad remarried back in 95 and my stepmother is cool I get along with her which is nice. I talk to them about once a week and when my dad is out of town working I go over to their house once every couple weeks to make sure she doesn't need anything done. I wouldn't change it for the world.

[BloodRed]

I had a good relationship with my mother, but a horriable relationship with my father as a kid. A lot of abuse and Mom didn't believe me. As I got older things changed a bit but I always resented him for the abuse. Of course that part got worst as I went through my normal teenage rebelion stage. Once college started, I didn't see them much even though I was living at home still. With a pretty much full time job and college around 4 hours a day, and my now wife, I didn't see them much. I moved out after college and got married a few months later. Since then my parents and I get a long much better. My dad has turned into a completely different person since he stopped smoking and then when my Mom had a hystorectomy. He has asked for forgiveness for the abuse, which is a big step. I still don't know if when I have kids I could trust to leave him alone with him.

[mrblunt]

My childhood has been interesting to say the least. It however has helped mold me into what I am today and the reason why I put my family above all else.

 

Try to stay with me here. My dad has been married 4 times. 1st wife died in a car accident when they were in their early 20's. He remarried a few yrs later to my biological mom. Into the picture I come, things between them don't work out and my dad gets custody. He remarries a few yrs later to the woman he was having an affair with, my sisters mom. She raised me and was always 'mom' to me. I love this side of the family dearly. They don't work out and my dad finally keeps it in his pants for a decade or so. He didnt have much choice, he went to federal P.M.I.T.A. prison for some bs. During his stay I lived with my mom over at my grandmothers house. I moved in with my other grandparents, my dads parents, for a yr waiting for dad to get out.

 

Fast forward a year. Dad is out, wants me back so I move into an appt with him and his GF. They soon marry b/c that's what my dad does. After 5-6 weeks of my 6th grade yr. my dad and his new wifey get into some trouble for cashing stolen checks. Back to PMITA prison he goes. I go to live with my aunt and uncle in Marysville. I'm there until my freshman yr of high school. Dad gets out again and moves to southern Ohio, Meigs County (which btw is awesome when you have a last name pronounced 'blunt'). I finish out school there, graduated top of my class.

 

I move to Cbus in 97 to go to school. Dad and current wifey follow, moving into her grandmothers house to help take care of her and for free rent. Dad and her get back into their old ways, using heroin. Dad shows up to my work asking for money several times. Once he threatened to try and steal something and try to return it in an effort to get me to give in. What a douche. A yr passes and I've transfered to OSU and got accepted into the School of Architecture. My uncle calls me to come over, they have some news. My step mom has OD'd on heroin, shes dead. I get into big altercation with my dad, calling him a worthless piece who wont stop regardless of what happens.

 

A year passes and I dont have much contact with my dad. By this point the drug use and years of working around asbestos have taken a huge toll on his body and he no longer can work(he has something like 15% lung capacity left and is on oxygen constantly) That same year my mom is diagnosed with lung cancer, it got the best of her in less than 6 months. She passed away at the age of 42 when her life was really just starting to get easier. She was a wonderful woman who I will always consider my guardian angel.

 

I didn't have contact with my biological mom until the Christmas of my 21st birthday. I've met her 1 time now and she seems very nice. I think shes got some issues as a result of the drug use her and my father did, she just doesn't seem 100% all there. I found out I have a 1/2 sister who lives in Colorado with her dad and I've recently started emailing her. My dad is still in and out of rehab centers and now has a 1 bedroom apt in Parkersburg WV down the street from the methadone clinic.

 

My childhood was a disaster. I did a lot of stupid things when I was younger as a result of growing up with my dad who was always stoned. But I vowed not to follow in my dads footsteps and I've turned out better than most people would expect. If it weren't for the love and support of my other family members I'd likely be very very different. I graduated high school 6th in my class, I'm 2 classes away from graduating with honors at DeVry. I don't have much of a relationship with my parents but I'm not gonna sit around and cry about it. These are the cards I was dealt and I'm trying to make sure my girls never have to go through what I did. If you get stuck into a crappy situation you only have your self to blame if you don't rise up and do something about it.

[l36tols1]

Me and mom have a good relationship she is there when I really need here. I would rather her stay old-school and non-tech savvy less questions I have to answer lol

[El Karacho1647545492]

wow these responses are a million times better than I expected. Seems to me there's a totally different side of CR that gets masked by silly e-battles. Keep up the good responses, fellas.

 

As for me, I'll go a little more in depth about myself since I didn't really cover it before.

 

I grew up in CT for 13 years where my dad immigrated to in 1964 from Portugal as a 15 year old whose only support was his older brother whom he lived with until he could afford his own place. His mother, my grandmother, has survived earthquakes in Portugal, moved to a completely new country at an old age without knowing the language, and survived her abusive alcoholic husband who died at 50, yet she will never ever say a bad thing about him. My parents met at the Boston Aquarium, though they went to the same HS in Manchester, CT. My dad was a 16 year old senior with 1 year of English under his belt and never failed to graduate valedictorian in any school he ever attended (HS, UConn undergrad, and in pursuit of his MBA), and my mom was a 15 year old sophomore. Since then they never split, my mom even worked to put him through business school so he could get his MBA. Coming from that, I have an extremely skewed view on relationships because I personally believe that people can work anything out of my parents can be together all the way through high school.

 

After living in CT for many years, my dad was terminated from Cigna Healthcare and was simultaneously offered an executive position at Nationwide Financial, a leap that no one in our family ever saw coming, so we packed up and moved west. Moving was tough on our family; even though I embraced change, it was still stressful and led to a lot of problems with my impending rebellious stage. A lot of that include turning my rebellion in on myself instead of against them, which led to a couple trips to the hospital mental ward. Never ever did my parents falter in their support for me though. My sister had similar problems, though it was less profound and more related to leaving all her best friends in CT. Recently, though, she seems to have let go of them as they had let go of her and she's embraced Ohio a bit more. Still, in the fall she decided she's following me here to Boston U, which has made me the happiest older brother in the world.

 

EDIT: More about me, I suppose. My parents are probably the most understanding people in the world, supported by my uncles and aunts. My uncles are the ones who gave me the rundown on drugs, as both my mom's brothers are the total acid casualty types, except without the ill effects. The elder one is the guy who gave me the Apache, he lives out in Berkeley, CA (you can see where this is going) and is a huge pothead. He's also a radiologist, not the kind of job you'd see for a burnout. The younger brother is a retired 35 year veteran of the CT Correctional System, having served as everything from a guard to correctional officer to warden for about 15 years. After that, he's a cancer survivor and a Red Cross director of emergency operations for the Northeast. They're essentially the ones who introduced me to smoking and how to do it without hurting myself and more importantly others. My parents found out about this and essentially told me "we don't approve at all, its not something we believe in, but you've got a solid head on your shoulders and if you think you can do this without interrupting your life, then its your decision. Just don't come to us when you can't get a job because of a drug test. We love you son"

[smokin5s]

My parents have been married for almost 40 years... they at this point I don't think really like each other that much, but I think at the same time rely on each other heavily for everything. I still make an effort to talk to my parents at least once a week. Growing up, I had a decent relationship with my parents.... my older brother passed away before I was born, so I think that my parents always kind of resented me because he passed away.

 

My parents having 3 living children, and typically, 2 kids bond with the parents better and it leaves 1 kid not as close.

 

After college, I tried to patch up our relationship and it's amazing how once you've grown up, you can see a different prospective and understand where they came from on issues that you had. It allowed us to have a pretty good relationship for a few years until my one sister got into alot of issues with drugs. During the height of the drug isssues, my sister was able to convince my parents that I did alot of bad things and my parents have never quite trusted me fully ever since (and I was completely innocent on this whole thing). Because of this, I have not spoken to my sister in many years and has caused a permenant stake to be driven between my parents and I.

 

I still talk to them about once a week and see them at least once a month. My in-laws on the other hand, I can't get away from. Paula has said on multiple ocassions that her mother is her best friend and they do alot of things together.

[verse]

My dad started texting me as of recent, and really seems to enjoy it regardless of how slow it is for him to form any words with the small keypad... It's almost hilarious how long it takes him to be honest.

 

Your dad texts me too. ROFL

 

My parents are definitely technologically challenged. I see them everyday and live right across the street from them. I have a very good relationship with them and they have been married 23 years this year.

 

They are also probably a bit older than most other 22 year old's parents on this forum. My dad is 66 this year and my mom is 55.

 

I also love Andy's parents too. haha They are like a second family to me.

[Patrick]

They are also probably a bit older than most other 22 year old's parents on this forum. My dad is 66 this year and my mom is 55.

 

That sounds like my friend, both of his parents are up there! You wouldn't tell it to look at them though.

 

 

Hella good, honest responses without anyone trying to make a mockery of it.

[81mercury]

seems im not the only one with a rough childhood.. i was born in baltimore md my mom, me and my sister lived in low income housing because my mom only worked part time and my dad was locked up in mctc for felony distrubution. my dad got out when i was 5 and showed up at the door and mom let him come back to start his life over, it was a horrible decision i still remember them screaming at each other all night. this began my downward spiral in school, my dad was back out of my life and my mom was working full time. buy 3rd grade i was banned from 2 schools for violent behavior. i started at an elementary school that offered a year around iss program and anger management counseling did great ther for a year then my dad showed back up with his new wife. he stuck around for a year or two then disappeared again, at the start of my 5th grade year my mom got locked up for possesion so i got shipped to the middle of a mountain in west virgiana to live with my grandmother(i can say i walked 5 miles uphill in the snow to school). for 6th grade my dad resurfaced and asked if i wanted to stay with him in ohio for the summer, i did and it turned out great but the summer between 6th and 7th grade my mom took me back to maryland because my grandmother was dieing of lung cancer, after that my mom decided that since she still had custody of me i had no reason to move back to ohio and was enrolled in another public school in hagerstown md. i made it 6 months there before the judge granted my father custody of me and ive been in ohio every since. i like it here and i have a great relationship with my dad and my mother. my dads been clean 8 years and my mom only visits twice a year.......theres my life story.

 

cliff note: i have a great relationship with my dad and an ok one with my mother

[Berto]

I have a great relationship with both my parents. They are still married. We moved here from Argentina when I was almost 2. I have no borhters or sisters so we are all we have here and we stick together. I talk to my parents at least 3 times a week. They usually come stay at my house two weekends a month. They don't smother me when they are here but we still get to hang out. I <3 my parents.

[El Karacho1647545492]

I have a great relationship with both my parents. They are still married. We moved here from Argentina when I was almost 2. I have no borhters or sisters so we are all we have here and we stick together. I talk to my parents at least 3 times a week. They usually come stay at my house two weekends a month. They don't smother me when they are here but we still get to hang out. I <3 my parents.

 

In my experience, South Americans and Europeans tend to keep the closest nuclear families.

[TheHaze]

My father died when I was 6ish. My mom has brought both my brother and myself up through a fantastic childhood experience. I really don't know how she did it by herself but she did a great job. I've always treated her with great love and respect and she has shown it back to us. She is my hero and I tell her that all the time. Not all Italian families bitch and moan at each other.